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NFL Week 13!

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December football is right around the corner….and we know what that means…. Fantasy football playoffs!!! (And the NFL one too, but there’s always a sadness when Week 17 ends….playoff football is nice, but it’s never the same as having 6-8 games on at once and trying to track the madness….)….at least we got a full month of enjoyable trash football games before all that playoff nonsense, right??

Thursday Nov. 29:

New Orleans at Atlanta:

Wow….want to talk a real rivalry?? The Saints team bus got EGGS THROWN AT IT as the Saints left the airport….that’s pretty awesome….These two teams do NOT like each other….the Saints dominance in this battle only adds to it, case in point a few weeks ago….right?? The Falcons haven’t lost since then but they don’t exactly look wonderful in the process….in fact the way the Falcons are built (long passes and big plays)….it doesn’t lean itself to being dominant and ineffective over a full season…you can only hit so many home runs, and you can win a lot more simply with singles down the field…it’s just their singles hitter in Michael Turner seems out of gas (he is a running back over 30)….neither one of these teams has what you’d consider an intimidating defense either….this one should be high scoring…and it should be nasty….I’m a bit worried about the Saints since they got the piss beat out of them on Sunday by the 49ers, but they NEED this game to stay in the Wild Card chase (considering GB and Seattle lost last week, they still have a pulse in that chase)….and I’ll go with the team with the history and the desperation behind them…..

Winner: Saints

Game Quality: **** (TNF game of the year no doubt)

Sunday Dec. 1:

1pm:

Seattle at Chicago:

Not that I’m saying anything…or starting any conspiracy….but it’s amazing how a guy can get traded to the Patriots and gets his suspension reduced….but all of a sudden a “non-marquis team” in Seattle is on a roll and looking like a playoff team and out of the blue, the entire Seattle secondary is failed PED tests?? Kinda fishy if you ask me…more so when one is maybe the most outspoken player in the league in Richard Sherman (who I’m a fan of for what it’s worth…) ….that aside this should be a helluva game since all the Seattle players are still playing in this one and the two best secondary’s are going at it here (assuming Tillman plays)….if this was in Seattle I’d love the Hawks…but with the Bears home and Jay Cutler playing (I’m expecting Forte to be out, but this is why they got Michael Bush, right?)…..the Bears will be too much for Russel Wilson to handle…this has ALL the makings of an ugly one though…..

Winner: Bears

Game Quality: ***

Houston at Tennessee:

Hey at least Matt Schaub gets a week to heal from the KICK OF DOOM TO THE NUTS by Mr. Suh….and hey anyone who thinks that was an “accident” never played hockey against me, the acts of goonery you can perform while making it look “flow of the play”….oh you’d be amazed…..but yet I get called for ‘tripping’ when some fool runs over my stick in my damn goal crease…. *eyeroll*…what do you expect from a league that cancels games due to PUDDLES….oh yeah….football….the Titans suck, run Foster run!!!

Winner: Texicans

Game Quality: DUD

Patriots at Miami:

Another uneventful “easy win” for the Pats this week….why is it come December most of the Patriot in-division games look that way?? Yeah Tannehill had a nice comeback game and beat Seattle in their building despite their defense and the lack of Miami weapons (PS, screw you Reggie Bush for waking up when I bench you)….this is one of those games the Pats should have wrapped up by halftime and just focus on their favorite tradition….stat padding….

Winner: Pats

Game Quality: *

Jacksonville at Buffalo:

It may be over for Blaine Gabbert in Jacksonville (that’s not a bad thing mind you)….Chad Henne has thrown for over 600 yards, 6 TDs and only one pick in his last two games (yes really) and he’s actually getting the ball to his receivers, something Gabbert damn near had an allergy too….the Bills…oh boy….this is classic “let’s look good in December and give some false hope and worse move up in the draft so we can’t get the QB we desperately NEED” mode….both of these teams do give up a stupid amount of points….this should be at least high scoring and full of big plays at least…hell I’m gonna watch this one Sunday and pray to see two trains collide and wreck all over the bar!! Oh wait…I gotta pick a winner….grrrr…. alright…..

Winner: Jacksonville

Game Quality: **

Colts at Lions:

The Colts are the feel good story in the NFL this year….Luck and the Chuck-Strong movement….bald cheerleaders and playoff dreams….the Lions are the feel BAD story in the league this year (aside of Calvin Johnson mind you)…stupid plays, idiotic ways to lose, no running game to speak of….and immature, idiotic coaching which is contagious and tearing this team apart one immature player at a time….this one’s pretty easy to pick a winner in……

Winner: Colts

Game Quality: ** ½ (if I don’t give this enough love I’m gonna get kicked in the nuts…)

Carolina at Kansas City:

You know…Carolina’s schedule gets a LOT easier at the end of the year….they could put a little run on here….and maybe winning 4 of 6 to end the season 6-10 takes the nasty taste out of their mouths and gives the Panthers something to hold their heads up about for next year….the Chiefs on the other hand played the game of their life last week and STILL lost…geesh, Brady Quinn threw for a whopping 126 yards….even Nick Foles laughs at you….what a mess…everyone’s gotta know there’s a massive reboot coming in KC….damn I’m spending too much time on this one….yay Jamaal Charles….and let’s just pick Carolina and move on here…..

Winner: Panthers

Game Quality: **

Arizona at Jets:

So yeah, I’ve been a lil tough on Jets Nation….and dammit why not…every Sunday I get annoyed and harassed and bothered (well only when the record if over .500) at the bar every week…but really that’s all in the past now….necessity is the mother of alliance after all right?? It’s all just sports…nothing personal right?? We’re ON THE SAME SIDE this week for God’s sake….it’s Arizona!! They can’t block anyone….they have Lindsay Lohan at QB….Beanie Wells?? CMOOONNNN….alright, yes there’s a reason I’m doing this….when Arizona was 4-2 (wasn’t that like 100 years ago now?), I was talking to Kelly and her father about the Cardinals….he goes “isn’t Arizona kinda good this year?”….I actually refrained from cursing and kept it kinda clean about how bad their offensive line was and that the Owen Hart dive from the rafters was coming….he didn’t believe me….I told…no I guaranteed to him that Arizona would be no better then 6-10 at season’s end…and before you know it….a dinner bet was born!! And since I love me some free dinner at Grillstone….and the Jets are all about frakking snacks….I WANT ME MY SNACK!!!! UNLEASH THE GREEN!!!! DO IT FOR FIREMAN ED!!!!! God I’m such a goddamn mess :P

Winner: J-E-T-S!!!!! (I mean it this time DAMMIT….CMMOONNN DINNER!!)

Game Quality: **** (Watching my head explode during this game is MUST WATCH)

49ers at Rams:

Ah the rematch of the NO ONE WINS CAUSE IT’S A TIE Bowl….God I love ties! The Rams have been a bit of a disappointment this year….I thought Fisher would have gotten a lil bit more out of them then he has this year….but this is still the “reboot year” for them, and I’m sure in the next year or two they’ll get better….that just ain’t now, the 49ers are the now…even with <random QB X> taking all the snaps….it’s so weird…it’s not like this is Montana vs Young 2.0 either, but you just gotta guess and hope that Harbaugh knows what the hell he’s doing….we won’t find out till mid-January, this game right now still has “revenge beating” written all over it… GORE GORE GORE!!!

Winner: 49ers

Game Quality: DUD

Packers at Vikings:

Man I was sooo off on the Vikings last week….then again I missed all the news flying to Dallas, had NO idea Jay Cutler was playing or that Percy Harvin was out (it didn’t hurt that my sh!tty hotel in Garland, TX did not have the NFL Network, and I’d rather rip out my eyed with an apple peeler then watch ESPN….I was a bit out of the loop last week), and because of such I did feel kinda silly picking the Vikings last week….and the Packers did get their Fudge Packed in on them pretty handily last week….injuries…on the road…crappy o-line play…whatever….that Sunday Night game was a crapfest….and while the Vikings can get to the QB…an angry Packer team getting just a lil bit more healthy is gonna be too much for them (just let AP do his thing for my money league…please?)

Winner: Packers

Game Quality: ** ½

4pm:

Tampa Bay at Denver:

This is a pretty interesting game here….the Bucs couldn’t hold on against Atlanta…and now they get the Peyton Manning experience…we find out pretty quick if the Bucs are overrated and over their heads here….I do think they are, but we know how I feel about Schiano at this point...Peyton rips them apart and teaches the young punks a VINTAGE regular season lesson here…..but Tampa has too much and won’t get blown away here, so we might get some kneel-down nonsense again!!!

Winner: Denver

Game Quality: **

Steelers at Ravens:

Here’s a fun fact….the Steelers can stop a checkdown pass on 4th and 29, then again I could probably throw 11 HS kids out there and one of them would trip over Ray Rice and stop him within 29 yards…oh Norv…just hang yourself on the team bus….Obviously if Ben doesn’t play this week the Steelers are DEAD….but I think for the long haul and the playoff chase it’s better they eat this game (SD, Dallas, Cincy and Cleveland…that’s 4 wins)….and focus on the four games after….but Ben’s nuts, and the rivalry means too much to these teams….this one will be nasty…but Flacco and this offense is worlds better at home…yeah the Steeler D is getting healthy…but this is a psyche game for the Ravens…they need this too much, especially after the Norv Turner Christmas Gift last week….it will be fun to watch….the Purple Haze shall ride again…”best WR Corps of all-time” or not :D

Winner: Ravens

Game Quality: ****

Browns at Raiders:

So Joss Wheedon is healthy and playing this game….he damn well better, the Raiders are a human bye week…damn shame though for Colt McCoy, I’d have loved to see him come in and do well here….that kid got a raw deal in Cleveland and I hope someone else takes a shot on him….anyway…I need to say something about the Raiders right….ummm, Kyle Reese…he’s like good….the rest of the team isn’t….anti-football rules with an early dinner at the bar…I got nothing nice to say here…and I do gotta work this afternoon…..

Winner: Browns!!!

Game Quality: **

Cincinnati at San Diego:

How does the Charger defense look at itself in the mirror, forget about looking at their teammates after THE CONVERSION last week….the worst part was the Chargers still had an overtime session to screw this up even MORE….it’s unthinkable….and honestly after that, the Chargers don’t even deserve a team bus, forget about being allowed to compete in NFL football games again….the Bengals are playing better and making a push to knock the Steelers out of the playoffs…this is a must win for them…and all games for San Diego are “must lose” now…it’s just a matter of how funny and EPIC the FAIL is…..

Winner: Bengals

Game Quality: **

8pm:

Eagles at Dallas:

Oh Lord….speaking of cluster’s….This looks the same as the last time these two teams played….the Cowboys are less of a hot mess then the Eagles (not by much….hey buddy can you spare a MLB?), Demarco Murray is actually on the practice field…and yeah whatever…it’s the Eagles…possibly the worst team in football…it would be nice for Dallas to lose this and maybe FINALLY the idiot Ginger who’s been ruining this offense could be OUT…but it won’t….find something else to do Sunday Night this game is gonna stink to high holy hell….

Winner: Dallas

Game Quality: anti-football goes prime!!

Monday Dec. 2:

NY Giants at Redskins:

For the first time RG3 plays a team for the second time and it should be real interesting to see the adjustments and how the Giants handle him and this offense the second time around…not like they didn’t win the first time either….having Garcon back helps the Redskins, but the Giants are getting healthier and into “turn it on” mode like they do this time of year….should be a fun game at least with big plays all over the place, and at least Gruden won’t be sounding like he wants to kill both teams like he did last week….

Winner: Giants

Game Quality: ****

NFL Power Rankings Week 12:

AFC:

  1. Houston…another week, another comeback, kick to the nuts aside….
  2. New England….cheer me up on Thanksgiving and I move you up the rankings!
  3. Denver….Kansas City letdown or has a weakness been exposed?
  4. Baltimore…Have you sent flowers and a thank you gift to Norv yet?
  5. Indianapolis….looking like a playoff lock…

NFC:

  1. NY Giants… yeup…it’s the stretch run…here they go…again….
  2. Atlanta…winning but it’s getting ugly…..
  3. Chicago…beat up the Vikings and took back first place….
  4. 49ers….It doesn’t matter who the QB is!!
  5. Redskins…the RG III show is gonna make the Wildcard chase interesting…..

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As far as your point on the Seahawks, wouldn't shock me if the NFL didn't want them in the playoffs cause of replacement-gate. Imagine the uproar if they did make it at the Packers' expense?

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Carolina at KC is great anti-football

True, there's been 2-3 games a week of it....the anti-football is almost losing its charm right now.....so many AWFUL teams out there....

As far as your point on the Seahawks, wouldn't shock me if the NFL didn't want them in the playoffs cause of replacement-gate. Imagine the uproar if they did make it at the Packers' expense?

There shouldn't be any....aside of the right call being made...where's the uproar about the "real refs" missing 90 seconds running off the clock in SF/StL? Or why didn't the Packers simply play BETTER in their other 15 games? The packers would have screwed the packers....but we know the league under Goodell doesn't work that way..... #discount-double-check

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Sorry in terms of NFL rivalries the Saints / Falcons rank as an epic Arena Football game.

Love Drew Bree's but he can't play Defense too. Falcons are pretenders playing in a crappy division.

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Sorry in terms of NFL rivalries the Saints / Falcons rank as an epic Arena Football game.

Love Drew Bree's but he can't play Defense too. Falcons are pretenders playing in a crappy division.

Crappy division? I don't think we can agree on much when it comes to the NFL. What is crappy about it? There isn't one really bad team in the division. The Panthers are bad record wise, but were leading the Falcons and Bears before losing on the final play of the games. They also blew an 11 point lead to the Bucs with 4 minutes left and were 12 seconds from victory. They have a lot of issues closing out games, but it isn't that bad of a team. The Saints and Bucs have very good offenses and brutal defenses, but I'd take the Saints now against most teams in the league. The Falcons are the Falcons, but they have taken care of business pretty much all year in the end. They need to get rid of Turner, and they'll be better. But I will agree that they are pretenders until proven otherwise.

It's a mediocre league, but the NFC South is no crappier than any other division in Football.

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Sorry in terms of NFL rivalries the Saints / Falcons rank as an epic Arena Football game.

Love Drew Bree's but he can't play Defense too. Falcons are pretenders playing in a crappy division.

Take off the purple glasses and watch the game tonight....you'll see.....

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No thanks, I will be seeing Steven Wright tonight. Probably slightly funnier than the Saints attempts to play defense or the Falcons advancing beyond the first round of the playoffs.

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Fitting Manta skipped Drew Brees having a Joe Flacco on the road impression and IMPLODING last night.....not to mention breaking that useless TD pass streak record of his....

Couldn't be a better week for it.....going against Brees in my money league :D

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Carolina at KC is great anti-football

Now it's just sad. I don't think they should play the game. It's meaningless for both teams anyway.

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Now it's just sad. I don't think they should play the game. It's meaningless for both teams anyway.

That will NEVER happen....I just don't want to see a 20 minute memorial for this guy .....I don't care what and why behind the reasons....when you do what he did and leave a 3 month old baby behind, you don't deserve a moment of respect....forget appreciation

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I think you're going to hear alot of talk again about how the nature of the game may have lead to such behavior...and calls to perhaps dissect his brain and see what was going on up there.

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I think you're going to hear alot of talk again about how the nature of the game may have lead to such behavior...and calls to perhaps dissect his brain and see what was going on up there.

Any wrestling fan who remembers the Chris Benoit incident (and who doesn't....)....will remember all the stuff that came out from that, the scary part is Benoit was 40 and had 20 years of shots to the head to turn his brain to mush.....if it happened to this guy at 25, this is a horrifying statement to ANY type of contact sport......

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Looks like Flacco is on a mission to prove how average he can be...he's been extremely meh since Week 5. Less than 200 yards passing in five out of the last eight weeks, three games under 50% completion...that's hard to do in today's NFL. With their schedule, the Ravens could be #4 seed by season's end. The Ravens-Broncos matchup is going to be huge, as is the Pats-Texans game.

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Yeah funny how Flacco and Matt Ryan both were going to set the world on fire with their no-huddle, hurry-up offenses this year, and both did in the first month of the season but they've tapered off to their career norms since - in Flacco's case a meh QB with moments and Ryan a decent, not upper-echelon QB.

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This was really a make-or-break season for Flacco, as far as being considered elite went...clearly he's not. Sad thing is if the Ravens face the Patriots at home or in NE, I still think they could win the game. Pats' D remains suspect, and I've seen their O get shut down in playoff games.

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I submit today's Arizona-Jets game to be the Anti-Football game of the decade.

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I submit today's Arizona-Jets game to be the Anti-Football game of the decade.

It really was until Rex finally got clued into the obvious, with 70,000 people helping him see the light. The Jets pretty much controlled the game after McElroy came in, except for that one stupid fumble by the backup FB that gave Arizona their second FG.

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I understand why McElroy was given a shot, but I think they still have to play Sanchez the rest of the season, just to see if they can right him. 7th-round QB draft picks don't tend to surprise a whole lot.

That being said, their offensive futility is staggering...since that 48-point Week 1 outburst, they've scored 180 points in 11 games.

Edited by Colorado Rockies 1976

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I submit today's Arizona-Jets game to be the Anti-Football game of the decade.

Me turning into a Jet fan for three hours and rooting for my dinner bet only added to the legend of that epic battle of anti-football at it's greatest!!! it's in my top 3 of all time to be honest :)

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This was really a make-or-break season for Flacco, as far as being considered elite went...clearly he's not. Sad thing is if the Ravens face the Patriots at home or in NE, I still think they could win the game. Pats' D remains suspect, and I've seen their O get shut down in playoff games.

True but you can also say the same thing about the Ravens being terribly suspect this season and lucking into most of their victories. Today that luck finally ran out along with their bear of a schedule to end the season: (@ Washington, Denver, Giants, @ Cincinnnati) the Ravens can easily end up with the 4th seed. Even with Ray Lewis the Ravens defense was getting gashed by the run and has serious issues at corner. The Patriots have Houston, San Francisco (underachieving now with QB controversy), @ Jacksonville, and Miami.

The way today's game in Miami progressed showed me more positives about the Patriots potentially in the playoffs than a 42-21 victory would have. The Patriots offense (on a day that Brady was eh', the receivers had the dropsies, and injuries on the O-Line took their toll on the offense) took over up 7 with 7:00 left and basically shoved the run down a good Miami defense's throat killing and closing the game the way they use to with Corey Dillon.

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True but you can also say the same thing about the Ravens being terribly suspect this season and lucking into most of their victories. Today that luck finally ran out along with their bear of a schedule to end the season: (@ Washington, Denver, Giants, @ Cincinnnati) the Ravens can easily end up with the 4th seed. Even with Ray Lewis the Ravens defense was getting gashed by the run and has serious issues at corner. The Patriots have Houston, San Francisco (underachieving now with QB controversy), @ Jacksonville, and Miami.

The way today's game in Miami progressed showed me more positives about the Patriots potentially in the playoffs than a 42-21 victory would have. The Patriots offense (on a day that Brady was eh', the receivers had the dropsies, and injuries on the O-Line took their toll on the offense) took over up 7 with 7:00 left and basically shoved the run down a good Miami defense's throat killing and closing the game the way they use to with Corey Dillon.

Not saying I think the Ravens would be the favorite to win. Funny thing is, the Ravens remind of a little bit of the Pats early on in Brady's career...doing just enough to win, though Brady was more clutch game in and game out than Flacco is (even when Brady's numbers weren't pretty). In recent years the Pats have turned into Peyton Manning's Colts: gaudy offensive numbers, but coming away ringless. Yes, Peyton did win once, but for the most part, his offenses could be shut down come playoff time. We've seen the same thing for the Patriots in recent years.

I think everyone is vulnerable right now...I would say Denver scares me the most at this point.

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I think everyone is vulnerable right now...I would say Denver scares me the most at this point.

I'd agree fully with that....the Ravens are a 4th and 29 away from a free fall right now....

If Denver can maintain an average running game without McGahee they're frightening....

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