Well here we are....halfway home in the NFL Season (and damn I thought this summer flew by with two hockey leagues, even being sick for a damn week didn't slow things down....never does)....and it seems even halfway in all we know is Green Bay is good, everyone else has issues and if you really suck, you need to suck at an exceptional level to get into the Suck for Luck sweepstakes....and Teebowing is funny, but its infinitely funnier when you do it after sacking Tim Teebow!!! Some really good games....and of course teams all fired up to pummel on Indy and Miami yet again!!Sunday November 6:
Jets At Bills:
It's a bit early in the season to call this a HUGE game...but if Buffalo pulls this out they are clearly in the AFC East driver's seat....I guess that's what makes it easier to like them in this one....the Jets aren't up against it here and that's where they are best....not to mention teams mostly suck coming off the bye this year and to be fair about it Buffalo is playing better, crisper football on offense and defense (though a pee wee team, or even the Rams could shut out the Redskins now a days)....I still like the way the Bills are playing now, and at home compared to the Jets who had sometime to relax and only play their best when there's a gun to their head....look, at least I gave good reasons right??
Game Quality: **** (it's the pre-game croissant considered having a fraking snack??)
Seattle at Dallas:
*sigh*....there is no worse feeling then to KNOW your team is just the same old average pile of crap that's gonna come in and pound on the lesser teams, but when faced with a team of equal or superior skill (like say....last week), you know your team's gonna get rick-rolled.....feelin me Pats fans on this one?? So yeah, Seattle is HORRIBLE.....Dallas is average at best.....gimmie average at best.....
Game Quality: * 3/4
Browns at Texans:
So now the word in Cleveland is they are souring on Colt McCoy and think he's part of the problem?? Are they INSANE?? You put Joe Montana (or someone even godlier in Joe Flacco *eyeroll*) on this team and they still barely win 4 games this offense is as limp as an old folk's home with a viagra shortage!! Seriously people!!! Maybe when they learn how to build an NFL team in Cleveland.....they can up and move them again *zing*....anyway, I still don't trust Houston, but how can you not when you look at the Browns roster, yes weird sh!t happens in the NFL....not here...not this week......
Game Quality: * 3/4
Falcons at Colts:
The Falcons are starting to play the kind of football that got them to 14-2.... the Colts are playing the kinda football that got them Peyton Manning in the first place....this one too you don't need to be building rocketships to figure this one out (look on the bright side Miami fans....Peyton is talking of playing the last one or two games, so he can personally cock-block the Colts from drafting his replacement....fvcking SMART ain't it?)
Game Quality: DUD
Miami at Kansas City:
God help me....but the Chiefs might be the hottest team in the AFC now....yes they got a LOT of help from the Raiders and Chargers in the last two weeks, but they are getting good running from Battle, some solid D (and excellent CB play from Flowers)....and they're starting to feel it....Todd Haley...FEAR THE BEARD!!! Miami on the other hand seems to have a mission statement of: play every game good but find a way to frak it up in the end so we can keep Sucking for Luck....I like that forumla personally....and it's just a weird feeling....this game might be more fun to watch then we expect, gonna have to keep an eye on this as Miami does what they do, just good enough to lose!
Winner: Not the Dolphins
Game Quality: *** (just a weird feeling, this will be a fun game....)
Tampa Bay at Saints:
Damn this is a rough one to call.....the Saints went from as dominant as you can be to as AWFUL as you can be in 7 days....and against equally as bad teams....could part of the problem be Sean Peyton is trapped up in the handicapped seats (ok, really the coordinator's box, but my way sounds cooler!)....it might be, few coaches are as animated and in your face as Peyton can be, and sometimes it is the little things that carry the weight...it also doesn't help having Mark Ingram be out and the running game reverts to the crap it was last year without him...Tampa gets Blount back, which helps them and hurts the Saints because they couldn't stop Sean Peyton if someone pushed him downhill during practice in his lil wheelchair (yes I'm allowed to make fun of wheelchair folk, I dated one for 7 years so *pffbbbttt*)....I like the Tampa D better, and the Saints record is not good when Drew Brees throws over 50 times (I heard it on XM and forgot the number sorry)....and he's gonna have to in this one...
funny that three weeks ago we thought the Saints were only a step behind Green Bay....that rift looks like the Grand Canyon now.....
Game Quality: ***
49ers at Redskins:
Now we know the difference in John Beck and Rex Grossman, less turnovers and fewer big plays....either way the revolving door at running back from Shanahan is spinning again, the WR's are bad, least they got Fred Davis, but the 49ers are just playing too well....and especially at QB (God help me for praising Alex Smith), there's no way in the world they screw this up to the Redskins.....
Game Quality: ** (GORE!!! GORE!! GORE!!)
Denver at Oakland:
Poor Kyle Boller, he still could have been the best QB on the field this week....but now Carson Palmer's had his lil mini-camp and his old WR butt-buddy in TJ Who's-yo-mama (CHAMPIONSHIP!) is in the fold too...like the Raiders needed more WR's right?....maybe Teebow should stop talking to God before the game to guide his passing arm....it ain't working....and this week we should be able to put to rest the "he's a winner, he just finds a way to win".....sorry you need TALENT in the NFL not to win, not just a stacked team and under the table recruiting! I do admit I'll be GLUED to this one!!!
Winner: Raiders (no QBs required!!)
Game Quality: *** 3/4 (CMON, this has delightful train-wreck all over it!!)
Bengals at Titans:
What an uninspiring match-up here....the Titans have no weapons (unless me trading for Chris Johnson did revive his running legs....least I ditched an RB who still had a bye week coming), the Bengals are just blah (well aside of Dalton to AJ Green)....and yes they win, and they play nice defense....they've also played more trash then Han and Luke waddled through when rescuing the Princess.....Jesus I just made a Star Wars reference....help me..... anyway....boring and average is better then boring and untalented.....
Game Quality: * 3/4 (did I mention these teams bore me?)
Rams at Cardinals:
Kevin Kolb may not play this week.....this might be a good thing....ha! Maybe Josh Skeletor can get the ball to larry Fitz once or twice? kthx!!! Maybe this is part me being so pissed off at Arizona, but the Rams can run the ball, Bradford may play, and good RB and QB play is better then anything Arizona's done all year....the Rams have a QB so no need to suck for Luck....maybe they go on a job-saving run in the second half here.....
Winner: RAMS (yes REALLY)
Game Quality: **** (this is an anti-football orgasm!!)
Giants at Patriots:
Boy did New England get EXPOSED last week? You man up and bully those WR's (yes bullying is good, it defines character and teaches you to stand up for yourself, but hey we've taken everything else away from children now, let's take away their chances to have self-worth!)....and you press Tom Brady and this team melts like that snow did two days later....and gee, the Giants can rush the QB and play solid offense....hell I can't believe I'm saying this...Eli's playing better football then Brady (right now mind you).....and I see no reason to think New England's gonna win this one....but you never know...only takes one play to make things right.....
Winner: Giants (better get your man to man defense on...)
Game Quality: ***
Packers at Chargers:
The Packers had two weeks to sit on this one....and the Chargers HAVE to be annoyed and dying to get back out there after that disaster last week....hell, Rivers has been AWFUL all season long, not just one botched snap (though it's bad when Dumbo can sit at home, spit up his popcorn and go DAMN THAT DUDE CHOKED!!), I do think the Packers are the best team in football and still will be after this one....but they're not going 16-0 (could you imagine how awesome it would be to see Brett Fraud have to suck it up and see the Packers have not only back to back Super Bowl wins but a perfect season on top....God his bitter lil bitch face would be epic!), and San Diego has the talent to knock them off....add in that it's November now, usually when the Chargers flip the switch and get to it....and hell I'm only putting ONE point on it......
Winner: Chargers (Rivers shall be AVENGED!!)
Game Quality: ****
Ravens at Steelers:
Ah, Round 2 of the body-bag game...it's a shame the second game is this early in the year....ah well, we'll probably get a rubber match anyway since both these teams are likely to make the playoffs....so that's a good pace, week 1, week 9, week 18...it all works out! Don't think for a second the Steelers have forgotten week one....the difference is the Steelers got younger (via injuries mind you), and a bit better...while the Ravens have stumbled a LOT in the last few weeks....and they don't know who they are...are they a spread em out and toss the ball team? Are they ground and pound with Rice? Are they a balanced team? I don't think the Ravens even know....and you let the Steelers jump up 3 TDs on ya, there's NO WAY you're coming back on them....first team to score gets a BIG edge in this one....the Steelers are just playing too well, and the Ravens aren't...getting your face kicked in by Jacksonville and giving a half of a game away to the Cardinals isn't gonna let the chest thumping be taken seriously (speaking of....Terrell Suggs.... begging Heinz Ward to play??? Seriously?)
Winner: Steelers (this ain't the Arizona Cardinals this week)
Game Quality: ***** (these need ice packs to just WATCH)
Monday November 7:
Bears at Eagles:
Two teams with really good backs, that hate running the ball.....a match made in heaven right?? This should be a fun, but nutty game to watch....the Eagles looked the best they have all year last week (being motivated, thank you much Rob Ryan, didn't hurt)....did the Cowboys wake the sleeping beast in the Eagles?? Dr McCoy is running the ball, and the Eagles weapons seem to be on track (thank you for the epic fantasy game Brent Celek!), on the other hand, Matt Forte might be the best back in football now....but he's getting PIST about his contract (PAY DA MAN!)....and Jay Cutler can morph into Philip Rivers in under 1.9 seconds....I gotta lean on the team that looks a lil more reliable and on the upswing....and the Bears were off last week....gotta go against that.....
Game Quality: **** (wow, good Prime Time games, who knew?)
NFL Power Rankings Week 8:
1. Buffalo, call it bias, call it whatever, no one else is playing as good on both sides of the ball as they are.....
2. Pittsburgh....not convinced they're elite, but 4 in a row and wins over NE and Jax have even the Ravens envious.....
3. Cincinatti...boring, unimpressive wins....still not convinced they're elite...or even good, but above average starts to look good in THIS AFC.....
4. Kansas City....four wins in a row, even though it was Phillip Rivers handing it to them.....
5. Ravens....this just shows how bad the AFC is that I have to still rank these bums.....
1. Green Bay....still above and beyond everyone else....
2. 49ers....if I can make the Bengals 3 in the AFC, I damn sure can rank the 49ers 2nd in the NFC!
3. Detroit....please don't let the NFL water-down your intimidating and bully ways, you guys are awesome to watch on defense, and fvck "hurting the other team's feelings" you guys are PROS, Teebow your lil asses off!
4. NY Giants....solid, and silently impressing while their big mouth lil brother gets all the attention....
5. New Orleans.....as bad a loss as you can have and stay in the top 5......