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Kovalchuk Retired Effective Immediately?


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#601 devilsrule33

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Posted 16 July 2014 - 07:51 PM

"I'm not your buddy, guy".

 

I have the same to say about it that we've all been saying for 2 years. Zach would have been great to have, however, not worth a 7.5 cap hit for 13 years. Same with Kovalchuk. He'd be making 11.3 million real money this season and next. He wasn't impressive in the KHL. What many of us have been saying, which is pretty clear, is that we lucked out on him leaving before he got bad. He had a great second half in 2011, and great 2012, and was ineffective in 2013. So he had 1 and 1/2 good seasons and 1 and 1/2 bad ones in his 3 year run. Those decade long contracts are exciting for one day when they get signed, and then you have to deal with the realities of them. I'm glad there's a limit on contracts now.

 

It's like when you break up with a girl and then find out that meth habit you suspected she had was real after all, and now you're glad you got out before it got bad.

 

 

Thank you.

 

DD56, I'm not sure. It really reminds me of when you used to date all these cute girl next-door kind of girls that were great in their own way, but a little boring. Then you get set up with this super-hot Russian girl, one of the prettiest girls you've ever seen that you have admired for a long time. Sure she is a little exotic and rough around the edges for your family's strict conservative values, but you are sure you can make some changes to her, so they approve. You find out at first she is so needy and demanding but you give into her demands because....well look at her.

 

At first you're disappointed, but it's probably a little blip in a very long-term relationship. Then everything is great, and she wins your heart by saying of the two of you "this is team", and she buys you and her these cool hoodies with your relationship motto. She has an extended break from work so In the summer she goes back to Russia to visit her family, and see some old friends, one of the friends that you know is really into her. He's gotten his act together and has a job, his own house and car...even if they are crappy at best. Next thing you know she is actually staying at his house, but you shrug it off because you just finished such an incredible year together. You sometimes hear some stupid rumours that she actually likes this guy she is staying with and misses Russia, but you dismiss it sounds like some jealous friends making sh!t up or some idiot that usually is only right about 2.3% of the time.

 

Eventually she comes back home, but you are not sure if things are still okay and the relationship seems a bit different, definitely not as hot and heavy as before, but that's okay. So things aren't as great as they were, and maybe she isn't as pretty as she once was. Then all of a sudden she completely shocks you one summer day by dumping you and telling you she is moving back to Russia and getting engaged to that guy she stayed with. You feel like you got punched in the stomach, but you'll survive. You keep thinking that you should have seen the signs coming, yet you were just blinded by love. On the plus side, you were about to build an $11 million mansion that she designed and demanded, and she left days before you were about to break ground on the project.

 

So you are looking for a new girlfriend, and there is just no one out there except this really old girl that you sort of used to know back in high school. Well really you watched her from afar, but never dreamed of talking to her. She was the most popular girl in school and was absolutely wild. Never in a million years could you see yourself with her. Except she's matured and is looking to settle down, and you're desperate and on the rebound. She's actually been hurt by a few boyfriends recently. Even though she looks great for her age, they keep dumping her for younger guys. So after a tough first few dates, things start to look really promising. She's smart, gorgeous and really funny. So easy to get along with and not demanding at  all. She loves everything about you which kind of shocks you because you are kind of plain and boring, and she's used to wild and crazy guys and more adventerous things. She really has matured and her priorities have changed. You know it won't last but you count yourself lucky everyday.

 

Yet part of you keeps looking at your ex-gfs Facebook page, and man does she look awful. Everything there seems awful, but you can't stop wondering about what could have been, even though you are in a better relationship now. And....wait wait.

 

Actually that doesn't sound like anything that we are talking about, Come to think of it now, it also very much reminds me of that girl you break up with who you suspect has a meth problem, and then it turns out she does. So fvcking true. We can all probably relate to that.

 

 

Now no more girlfriend analogies please, unless you can work meth into them.


Edited by devilsrule33, 18 July 2014 - 09:16 PM.

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#602 Devil Dan 56

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Posted 16 July 2014 - 08:07 PM

DR33... I won't quote that for scrolling purposes, but damn!   :haha2:  :clap2:  :clap2:  :clap2:  :clap2:


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#603 Satans Hockey

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Posted 16 July 2014 - 08:08 PM

Lol next on NJ devs.... The relationship advice thread haha
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#604 RizzMB30

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Posted 16 July 2014 - 08:30 PM

DR33....very nice.  Post of the year worthy.   :clap2:


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#605 Blown01NJ

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Posted 16 July 2014 - 09:34 PM

DR33....very nice.  Post of the year worthy.   :clap2:


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Posted 17 July 2014 - 05:59 AM

Good one dr33.  Chuckleworthy and then some. 


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#607 2ELIAS6

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Posted 17 July 2014 - 07:53 AM

Lol next on NJ devs.... The relationship advice thread haha

bet your ass its coming.. it will be an extension to the de-railed brodeur thread.

Edited by 2ELIAS6, 17 July 2014 - 07:54 AM.

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#608 Devilsfan118

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Posted 17 July 2014 - 08:14 AM

Holy sh!t that's.. Amazing dr33.
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#609 MantaRay

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Posted 17 July 2014 - 12:23 PM

He never wanted to be here in the first place. Good riddance.


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#610 Joonas #6

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Posted 18 July 2014 - 09:30 AM

I miss Kovy's summer training montage photos in the woods. So I thought I'd share some of his recent photos. Oh, look how happy he is  :)

 

D_MsaCq7sCQ.jpg

 

fxFZ0Zy9gsg.jpg

 

qEdlzgLI6po.jpg


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#611 Devilsfan118

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Posted 18 July 2014 - 04:44 PM



I agree with Manta - screw him.  But man he was exciting.  

Warning - the above video may be upsetting to some Devils fans.  Viewer discretion is advised.


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#612 RizzMB30

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Posted 18 July 2014 - 06:12 PM

My gawd.  That right hook on Brayden Schenn...Good lord.  2012 will still go down as one of my favorite seasons to watch the team.  Hell, it might go down as Kovy's best NHL season.

Cango has improved since this season as well. 


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#613 Devilsfan118

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Posted 19 July 2014 - 05:11 PM

My gawd.  That right hook on Brayden Schenn...Good lord.  2012 will still go down as one of my favorite seasons to watch the team.  Hell, it might go down as Kovy's best NHL season.


2012 was definitely one of the most enjoyable and exciting years in recent memory I'd say.  Especially compared to the brutally boring hockey the team played last year.  

 

Life's a real bitch - at the time we were expecting that kind of play from Kovy and Parise for the next decade.  

 

Cango has improved since this season as well.

 

Agreed.  I actually don't mind him anymore.


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#614 Pepperkorn

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Posted 24 July 2014 - 07:30 AM

DD56, I'm not sure. It really reminds me of when you used to date all these cute girl next-door kind of girls that were great in their own way, but a little boring. Then you get set up with this super-hot Russian girl, one of the prettiest girls you've ever seen that you have admired for a long time. Sure she is a little exotic and rough around the edges for your family's strict conservative values, but you are sure you can make some changes to her, so they approve. You find out at first she is so needy and demanding but you give into her demands because....well look at her.

 

At first you're disappointed, but it's probably a little blip in a very long-term relationship. Then everything is great, and she wins your heart by saying of the two of you "this is team", and she buys you and her these cool hoodies with your relationship motto. She has an extended break from work so In the summer she goes back to Russia to visit her family, and see some old friends, one of the friends that you know is really into her. He's gotten his act together and has a job, his own house and car...even if they are crappy at best. Next thing you know she is actually staying at his house, but you shrug it off because you just finished such an incredible year together. You sometimes hear some stupid rumours that she actually likes this guy she is staying with and misses Russia, but you dismiss it sounds like some jealous friends making sh!t up or some idiot that usually is only right about 2.3% of the time.

 

Eventually she comes back home, but you are not sure if things are still okay and the relationship seems a bit different, definitely not as hot and heavy as before, but that's okay. So things aren't as great as they were, and maybe she isn't as pretty as she once was. Then all of a sudden she completely shocks you one summer day by dumping you and telling you she is moving back to Russia and getting engaged to that guy she stayed with. You feel like you got punched in the stomach, but you'll survive. You keep thinking that you should have seen the signs coming, yet you were just blinded by love. On the plus side, you were about to build an $11 million mansion that she designed and demanded, and she left days before you were about to break ground on the project.

 

So you are looking for a new girlfriend, and there is just no one out there except this really old girl that you sort of used to know back in high school. Well really you watched her from afar, but never dreamed of talking to her. She was the most popular girl in school and was absolutely wild. Never in a million years could you see yourself with her. Except she's matured and is looking to settle down, and you're desperate and on the rebound. She's actually been hurt by a few boyfriends recently. Even though she looks great for her age, they keep dumping her for younger guys. So after a tough first few dates, things start to look really promising. She's smart, gorgeous and really funny. So easy to get along with and not demanding at  all. She loves everything about you which kind of shocks you because you are kind of plain and boring, and she's used to wild and crazy guys and more adventerous things. She really has matured and her priorities have changed. You know it won't last but you count yourself lucky everyday.

 

Yet part of you keeps looking at your ex-gfs Facebook page, and man does she look awful. Everything there seems awful, but you can't stop wondering about what could have been, even though you are in a better relationship now. And....wait wait.

 

Actually that doesn't sound like anything that we are talking about, Come to think of it now, it also very much reminds me of that girl you break up with who you suspect has a meth problem, and then it turns out she does. So fvcking true. We can all probably relate to that.

 

 

Now no more girlfriend analogies please, unless you can work meth into them.

After all your years of mocking you produce this masterpiece.  And look dude -- it got you THREE reputation points. 

 

(FYI - this is how it works:  "TLDR," so everyone missed the whole last part there - it was the analogy that won you those points, don't fool yourself.  BUT they did read the very last sentence -- which total agreed with the original analogy making your ENTIRE post pointless! FABULOUS!   THAT is beauty in the off season post.  I'm so proud of you :wub:

 

EDIT:  Oh the LAST very last sentence was ignored by all - I originally assumed that was a given but thought I better add it in in case you thought I hadn't realized it, but I know you must have known. but in case someone had to post the clarification for me I thought I'd put that in there now.... but this won't get read because no one reads the VERY last last sentence.


Edited by Pepperkorn, 24 July 2014 - 07:35 AM.

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#615 dmann422

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Posted 24 July 2014 - 09:40 AM

After all your years of mocking you produce this masterpiece. And look dude -- it got you THREE reputation points.

(FYI - this is how it works: "TLDR," so everyone missed the whole last part there - it was the analogy that won you those points, don't fool yourself. BUT they did read the very last sentence -- which total agreed with the original analogy making your ENTIRE post pointless! FABULOUS! THAT is beauty in the off season post. I'm so proud of you :wub: )

EDIT: Oh the LAST very last sentence was ignored by all - I originally assumed that was a given but thought I better add it in in case you thought I hadn't realized it, but I know you must have known. but in case someone had to post the clarification for me I thought I'd put that in there now.... but this won't get read because no one reads the VERY last last sentence.

I read the last sentence... It's a run on and used the word "but" four times. That's a lot for one sentence.
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#616 Daniel

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Posted 24 July 2014 - 10:08 AM

I miss Kovy's summer training montage photos in the woods. So I thought I'd share some of his recent photos. Oh, look how happy he is  :)

 

D_MsaCq7sCQ.jpg

 

fxFZ0Zy9gsg.jpg

 

qEdlzgLI6po.jpg

 

Funny, in the middle picture he looks like he's a bit out of shape for a pro hockey player.


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#617 devilsrule33

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Posted 24 July 2014 - 10:18 AM

Funny, in the middle picture he looks like he's a bit out of shape for a pro hockey player.

 

He is totally out of shape, but he is coming off knee surgery...so I think it's expected that he'd gain quite a bit of weight.

 

Two months to get in game shape is pretty good. It used to be acceptable to come to camp looking like that and using training camp to lose the weight.


Edited by devilsrule33, 24 July 2014 - 10:20 AM.

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"The Stanley Cup has fallen from the Stars. The new millennium has its first Stanley Cup Champion, and it's the New Jersey Devils." Mike Miller calling the Devils winning the Stanley Cup.

"It goes to the captain and then there are handoffs during a skate around the ice" Mike Emrick as Scott Stevens is being presented the Stanley Cup.


#618 Pepperkorn

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Posted 24 July 2014 - 12:00 PM

I read the last sentence... It's a run on and used the word "but" four times. That's a lot for one sentence.

hahahahaha .... butt.


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#619 Joonas #6

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Posted 24 July 2014 - 02:18 PM

Funny, in the middle picture he looks like he's a bit out of shape for a pro hockey player.

 

I know. But you should see some of the other SKA players... Damn...


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#620 mfitz804

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Posted 24 July 2014 - 08:42 PM

Just watched the highlight reel above...what hands he had, so smooth.
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