Sunday November 4:
49ers at Falcons:
Is it a sign that you go to a place too much when the people who control the TVs come to you and ask which game to cut (see Sun Tavern can only have 8 games on at once… and there was 9 at 1pm)… so I explained it nice and simple… “Look y’all know I LIVE for these days and seeing all the games… I’ve lost friends and ended relationships over these Sundays (hey if you can’t accept that I do what I do and want no part of it TAKE A HIKE!) I’ve left places at 6am to get here on time…. And with all that in mind.. there IS NO WAY IN THE WORLD you can get me to sit through this one!!” (Oddly enough… another customer complained to me that the game wasn’t on… when did I become middle management??)... anyway… Atlanta wins… hooray? There was no reason to watch this unless you were desperate and had Warrick Dunn somewhere! Though it would be a magnificent punishment in jail for Mister Ron Mexico while he’s locked up in the Federal Clink!
Bengals at Bills:
What did I say about the Bengals?? NO HEART.... yeah that about covers it… though I find it funny that the Bills are 3-0 since the BUFFALO STINKS incident! That said it’s nice to see JP Losman was doing what he figured out in the pre-season… throw the ball high long and deep and let the speed guys run up to it and MAKE PLAYS… and well you add in that Marshawn Lynch fella (sad that he has more touch on the HB Option Pass then either one of the QBs)… and yeah there’s delusions of grandeur in Buffalo… they have more wins then the Sabres now don’t they???
Broncos at Lions:
Damn did the Broncos get their sh!t pushed in or WHAT?? I thought it was bad for them before…but to get ROLLED by the Lions (and credit to them is coming)… but damn.. this season is OVER in Denver (to think the Rockies were more competitive in October…)and then Jay Cutler gets rolled up… which lead to my line of the day “Damn Patrick Ramsey is so bad that Heather wants to get married so she can change her name and not be asked if she’s related to this bum by football geeks like us!!” Impressive win for the Lions like I said, who are making a case for the playoffs and big time! Though I hope you all saw that super fat guy with the 4 inch leap SMASH Selvin Young with that stiff arm as he drunken wobbled his ass into the end zone (kinda like how I’d have been walking home at that time)
Packers at Chiefs:
Well the Chiefs almost had this one wrapped up too… Favre was looking awful, the Chiefs were doing enough to win (despite what can be a NASTY Larry Johnson injury that carted him out of the game)… all it took was one play… one missed coverage by a safety.. and Greg Jennings to the house and the Chiefs just couldn’t respond… and now the Packers have back to back road wins over the Chiefs and Broncos and now Brett Favre has beaten every NFL in the land… hooray?
Chargers at Vikings:
It’s amazing when you line up to play the Vikings… you look at this team…. And you say… hey all they got is Adrian Peterson and we can stop the run… we’re a good team… we got a good back ourselves… and we’re on a roll, we can take them!!.. and then you let Peterson run for 235 yards in the second half!! (how the hell does that happen.. not that I mind since Peterson and Adaai are my money league MVPs right now!).. you even get the most absurd play of the season when the Vikings miss a FG (and by now EVERYONE knows you line up a return guy back there) and the dude goes 109 yards 2 feet and 6 inches for the TD and UNTOUCHED… and YOU STILL GET STOMPED!! Guess Childress ripped them a new one at the second half and it worked eh?? The Chargers are a joke and I apologize for even ranking them last week… won’t happen again!! (now watch they go beat the Colts next week….)
Jaguars at Saints:
I’m taken back by this one, but then again when Drew Brees has time and 445 yards there’s not many teams beating them… and the Saints did a good job of stuffing the run and making Quinn “Earl Grey Tea” have to throw the ball… 3 INT’s much… my favorite was the last one… he throws it late… I yell EARL GRAY TEA (like I said.,.. I was feisty Sunday)… and the pass gets picked… err. Make that EARL GRAY INT!!! And yeah that about sums up this stomping!
Redskins at Jets:
Wow, the Redskins matched Adrian Peterson on the ground in this game! But even so, the Jets jumped out early on them running the opening kickoff back (that Leon Washington is a dangerous lil bastard) and Kellen Clemens was effective.. not too much different then Chad but he can move and it’s sad when he gets as many rushing yards as Thomas Jones… they need to send him back to Chicago… but imagine how bad the Jets would be if they had traded for Cedric Benson! But I hate to sound like Joe Beningo, but he’s right… the Jets are the Jets… the O-Line stinks (maybe cause half of it is wearing the other team uniform now)… and they can’t put ANYONE away… and credit to the Redskins, they did get back into this 3 points at a time (but maybe they are not as good I hyped them to be… some of that I think is this coaching staff has the reigns pulled in TOO much on Campbell… 8 weeks and ZERO WR touchdowns… come on!)
Cardinals at Tampa:
Ugly, brutal… sloppy game that just really shouldn’t have been watched much, though the Joey Galloway story is an AMAZING one… the same with Earnest Graham and Jeff Garcia… but the Cardinals have come apart at the seams… Warner was bad, the receivers sloppy… Edge was ineffective (minus the touchdown)… and even the coaching staff had it go against them…missing a timeout (they spent all three to get the Bucs to punt with 3:00 left… rookie mistake there) and can’t challenge the late Kurt Warner interception (though why waste ALL your timeout’s before the 2:00 warning…didn’t see enough of the game to really kill them on the time out-management)… and somehow Arizona is still only one game behind awful Seattle!
Panthers at Titans:
This had to be a bad case of aw no NOT AGAIN to David Carr (I still hate his pansy gloves)… he had a Titan pass rush up his ass all game long, and they beat the living bloody piss out of him all game long… and for ANYONE who doubts how important the QB is in the NFL… look at the Panthers and look at say… Cleveland.. the difference… the guy taking the snaps … of course! Good game for Tennessee as Lendale White is running all over the place on people… as is Vince Young… what else can be said?
Seattle at Cleveland:
A very fun and spirited game that fortunately ran late so that people who were obsessed with the mini-Bowl got to enjoy bits and pieces of this game too… Derek Anderson does it again putting up 347 passing yards and Jamal Lewis pissing me and others off with his 4 TD day… and well.. Seattle…. I don’t get it.. they’re just finished, but at least they put up enough to keep this game fun (and hell they are dominating that joke division at 4-4… can they send Hasselbeck to Arizona so at least one team isn’t a joke in the NFC Worst??)… and for the first time in a LONG LONG time… we have a MEANINGFUL Browns and Steelers game… damn that does feel good to say!
Houston at Oakland:
Well the Raiders were fun to watch for 4 weeks at least this year…but when Ron Dayne and Sage Rosenfelds ROLL you… yeah… and when you’re Raider fans want the game to be blacked out so they can see Colts and Pats… yeah….did I mention Ran Dayne ran for 120 yards too?? Josh McCown came back from an injury and only threw 3 picks, so I guess the cries for Mister Russell will start to begin… least I wasn’t fool enough to play Lamont Jordan this week!!
Patriots at Colts:
It was nice to see the OH MY GOD THIS IS THE UBER-ROXXOR GAME OF THE WEEK and see it actually DELIVER… 200+ total yards from Joseph Adaai (and how GOOD is he?) The Colts played well even without Harrison in the game (which hurt them yes… but you had this feeling that the Colts weren’t gonna win when Vinateri misses a 50 yard FG… like the first kick in a big game he’s EVER missed… and the Colts can’t put it in the end zone early… and the Pats get it back going.. and man how GOOD was Randy Moss in this game… those one hand SNAGS (comparing that to the drop in his hands by Reggie Wayne)… so now the question is… who beats the Pats?? Not anyone in the first 17 weeks of the year!
Dallas at Phily:
REST IN PEACE EAGLES… YOUR SEASON IS NOW OVER!!!! Damn that feels good to say… one down… two to go!!! Dallas really and wholly stomped them from snap one… making McNabb fumble (and don’t look now, but the Dallas defense looks REALLY good since week one… and Tank Johnson joins the D-Line next week)…. The offense is running as well as it can… even Julius Jones finds the end zone… but hey at least we put in the subs and didn’t run it up (though if you look back in history at what some of the Buddy Ryan did to the pre-second coming Cowboys… we coulda had a case… but I’d rather save it for the next battle… and BATTLE it shall be!!)
Monday Nov. 5:
Steelers at Ravens:
When I come home from a Devils game (that was horrid and I swear I am still fvcked up from all the shots on Sunday).. and I see 35-7 and Big Ben had 5 TD passes… I say fvck spending the time to find out about this one… the Ravens are trash on offense and I am sure it showed on the big stage tonight!!!
Week 9 Power Rankings:
1. New England…. 7 more to go?
2. Indianapolis… no Harrison and a team better to go in New England anyway… round II is the one that matters.
3. Tennessee… they can run the ball on EVERYONE
4. Pittsburgh.. the can of whoop ass is still being poured on the Ravens!
5. Cleveland… I like them, the most fun team in the NFL now… period!
1. Green Bay… you ask who they beat… they beat the Giants, Redskins, Broncos and Chiefs, that’s pretty damn impressive!
2. Dallas… bye bye Eagles!!!!
3. Detroit… the offense and the running fat guys with stiff arms are just too good!
4. NY Giants….none of the teams who played impressed enough to knock them off!
5. Washington… they still found a way to win.. they need to work the WR’s more though