"I'm not your buddy, guy".
I have the same to say about it that we've all been saying for 2 years. Zach would have been great to have, however, not worth a 7.5 cap hit for 13 years. Same with Kovalchuk. He'd be making 11.3 million real money this season and next. He wasn't impressive in the KHL. What many of us have been saying, which is pretty clear, is that we lucked out on him leaving before he got bad. He had a great second half in 2011, and great 2012, and was ineffective in 2013. So he had 1 and 1/2 good seasons and 1 and 1/2 bad ones in his 3 year run. Those decade long contracts are exciting for one day when they get signed, and then you have to deal with the realities of them. I'm glad there's a limit on contracts now.
It's like when you break up with a girl and then find out that meth habit you suspected she had was real after all, and now you're glad you got out before it got bad.
DD56, I'm not sure. It really reminds me of when you used to date all these cute girl next-door kind of girls that were great in their own way, but a little boring. Then you get set up with this super-hot Russian girl, one of the prettiest girls you've ever seen that you have admired for a long time. Sure she is a little exotic and rough around the edges for your family's strict conservative values, but you are sure you can make some changes to her, so they approve. You find out at first she is so needy and demanding but you give into her demands because....well look at her.
At first you're disappointed, but it's probably a little blip in a very long-term relationship. Then everything is great, and she wins your heart by saying of the two of you "this is team", and she buys you and her these cool hoodies with your relationship motto. She has an extended break from work so In the summer she goes back to Russia to visit her family, and see some old friends, one of the friends that you know is really into her. He's gotten his act together and has a job, his own house and car...even if they are crappy at best. Next thing you know she is actually staying at his house, but you shrug it off because you just finished such an incredible year together. You sometimes hear some stupid rumours that she actually likes this guy she is staying with and misses Russia, but you dismiss it sounds like some jealous friends making sh!t up or some idiot that usually is only right about 2.3% of the time.
Eventually she comes back home, but you are not sure if things are still okay and the relationship seems a bit different, definitely not as hot and heavy as before, but that's okay. So things aren't as great as they were, and maybe she isn't as pretty as she once was. Then all of a sudden she completely shocks you one summer day by dumping you and telling you she is moving back to Russia and getting engaged to that guy she stayed with. You feel like you got punched in the stomach, but you'll survive. You keep thinking that you should have seen the signs coming, yet you were just blinded by love. On the plus side, you were about to build an $11 million mansion that she designed and demanded, and she left days before you were about to break ground on the project.
So you are looking for a new girlfriend, and there is just no one out there except this really old girl that you sort of used to know back in high school. Well really you watched her from afar, but never dreamed of talking to her. She was the most popular girl in school and was absolutely wild. Never in a million years could you see yourself with her. Except she's matured and is looking to settle down, and you're desperate and on the rebound. She's actually been hurt by a few boyfriends recently. Even though she looks great for her age, they keep dumping her for younger guys. So after a tough first few dates, things start to look really promising. She's smart, gorgeous and really funny. So easy to get along with and not demanding at all. She loves everything about you which kind of shocks you because you are kind of plain and boring, and she's used to wild and crazy guys and more adventerous things. She really has matured and her priorities have changed. You know it won't last but you count yourself lucky everyday.
Yet part of you keeps looking at your ex-gfs Facebook page, and man does she look awful. Everything there seems awful, but you can't stop wondering about what could have been, even though you are in a better relationship now. And....wait wait.
Actually that doesn't sound like anything that we are talking about, Come to think of it now, it also very much reminds me of that girl you break up with who you suspect has a meth problem, and then it turns out she does. So fvcking true. We can all probably relate to that.
Now no more girlfriend analogies please, unless you can work meth into them.