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Member Since 20 Jun 2009
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GDT: Devils vs Perennial Suck Squad

20 November 2015 - 06:58 PM

Same lineup as last game for us, minus Kinkaid in net for Schneids.


As for the other team? Who cares... oh maybe Fayne will play. Good for him, good for him.


"For a team who has picked first so many times, they sure do suck worse than a bottom feeding fish," one undisclosed Devils' player said when asked about their team compared to the Oilers, "Maybe if we were gifted a sh!t ton of #1s, we'd not be floundering before going into a new building."


When asked for a retort, some former guy calling himself 'The Great One' said, "I'm glad they've upgraded from a Mickey Mouse organization to Warner Brothers, I dunno, maybe the Animaniacs would be a better insult now?" he said, forgetting he's talking about a team that has actually seen the post season multiple times this millennium, let alone championships.


The Devils, fresh off their annual loss in Calgary, look to rebound and increase their hold on a spot in the wild card race. Leading Detroit by a mere point, New Jersey is surprising many around the league. "I looked up from blowing Crosby as I was taking notes on Callahan and Parise and suddenly the Devils were in the Wild Card spot. Needless to say, I was surprised and nearly spit.... donut glaze all over the couch. They shouldn't be doing good, the NHL said so."


"fvck him, fvck everyone who doubted us, I'm here to fvck sh!t up," one unammed Devils player said following hearing the comments. "I cant wait to add my 4th on Friday," Farnham he added.


Faceoff time is set for 7 MT.





GDT: Stemp's Streakers against Fruity Drink Accessories

24 October 2015 - 10:01 AM









Assuming no lineup changes other than possibly Merrill [if healthy] for Gelinas







Buffalo, NY - In a battle between one team with an inflated sense of self worth versus a team who shocked even themselves by putting together three straight wins, one team is bound to leave disappointed.


"I don't understand it, we have [Jack] Eichel, we got Ryan O'Riley, shouldn't the league bow down to us?"- one Sabres' player said while milking a watered down LaBatt Blue Light at Pearl St. Brewery.


The Sabres, fresh off their ass pounding by the Canadiens will trot out some overrated, over paid for goalie into net hoping to avert a similar showing than Friday night.


"Well the trap team can't score, so I shouldn't have to worry too much in net," said Robin Lhener, looking at archived news articles from 7 years ago, forgetting the Buffalo News has a difficult time reporting on anything from this decade, or the truth for that matter.


When asked if he was "excited" or "nervous" to face the scoring threats of Eichel, Kane and O'Riley, expected starter, Cory Schneider, said "Do I look like I'm fvcking scared?"


Faceoff is set for 7, Eastern.