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I solved the “Will Taylor Hall Re-Sign” issue


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I had an epiphany this morning, and I worked out a flawless plan.


  • Find hottest single girl in NJ; Miss New Jersey pageant might be where you start.
  • Using the Twitter, set up Chipotle date.
  • Taylor falls in love with Miss New Jersey, gets married, and god willing, pops out a quick kid.
  • Miss New Jersey will want to stay near her family, she’ll need help, especially since her husband is away so much.
  • Taylor will not want to leave NJ, and re-signs a huge extension to retire as a Devil. 


  • Taylor is not allowed to hang out with Kinkaid. Next thing you know, that Acorn chick is all “I have a friend...” who lives in Nashville, and Taylor realizes the paths to both love and the Stanley Cup end in Nashville.


  • Flying DeLorean, go back in time, create an alternate 2020 with circumstances that make Taylor want to re-sign here. Make sure that plan doesn’t include us setting him up to fvck his own mother. 

I really don’t see a single hole in this plan (insert Miss New Jersey joke here). 

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9 minutes ago, Nicomo said:

Wait a minute...you mean players can have the NYC experience without playing for the Rags?? Well this changes everything...

Also, she’s very pretty. Good for him. 

You shouldn't. Play here, stay the fvck out of New York.

I was adamant that Cory wouldn't re-sign, so I'm gonna go the other way and guarantee it doesn't get close to free agency for Taylor. He'll die here. 

Edited by thecoffeecake
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Nah, not a stalker...just providing info as some seemed interested.  I don't have the Professional Googler title for nothing!  Easily found if you follow some Devils hashtags.  Apparently these ladies regularly attend games in support of their dudes.

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