The Movies thread!

[UnderDogX]

you're the last fan, he meets you, you die of excitement, he offs himself cause there are no more left, then the movie ends when a crowd gathers at his funeral to honor him and they're all underground fans that did not want to admit it in public.

You forgot the part where we find out he was actually dead the whole time...

that and the part where he ruins a beloved cartoon with horrible casting, terrible pacing, and an utter disregard for anything and everything that made the show great...but i'm not mad or anything...

[Satans Hockey]

I saw Piranha 3d today. The movie itself is awesome, I love horror/gore/etc type films and this lives up to it in every way possible. That being said I think 3d sucks. I have no use for this stupid gimmick. I would have much rather seen the movie without the 3d and I would have enjoyed it more but for 8 bucks I really can't complain too much.

I highly recommend it if you are into this type of horror movie but stay away from the 3d!

[jagknife]

I saw Piranha 3d today. The movie itself is awesome, I love horror/gore/etc type films and this lives up to it in every way possible. That being said I think 3d sucks. I have no use for this stupid gimmick. I would have much rather seen the movie without the 3d and I would have enjoyed it more but for 8 bucks I really can't complain too much.

I highly recommend it if you are into this type of horror movie but stay away from the 3d!

so its actually better than its horrendous ScyFy predecessor? cause as far as i recall, its almost a shot for shot remake.

[DH26]

I saw the Expendables on Sunday. Let's just say you have to like 80s action movies to get anything out of this thing. Sly Stallone hasn't quite captured what he did when he wrote Rocky. The dialogue was atrocious, the action was over the top stupid, they didn't even tell half of the characters names, Stone Cold didn't give anybody the stunner and Drago and Stallone didn't fight again but I still loved every second of it.

[njskaguy33]

Should have a full review of Get Low and the Expendables by the end of the week but the basic summary is Get Low was quite good, bordering on great and The Expendables was terrible. Absolutely atrocious. And I'm not talking in a smarmy, "I'm a critic and only watch presitge Oscar films" kind of way. I'm talking in a "I went to see something on the level of Commando and got story, acting and direction that bordered on film student level" kind of way. Very disappointing.

Edited August 25, 2010 by Bulletproof

[DH26]

Should have a full review of Get Low and the Expendables by the end of the week but the basic summary is Get Low was quite good, bordering on great and The Expendables was terrible. Absolutely atrocious. And I'm not talking in a smarmy, "I'm a critic and only watch presitge Oscar films" kind of way. I'm talking in a "I went to see something on the level of Commando and got story, acting and direction that bordered on film student level" kind of way. Very disappointing.

I probably just liked the expendables because I had no expectations. I expected everything to be terrible and everything from Sly's goatee to the dialogue was just awful and that's what I expected. I went into it the same way I'd see Piranha 3D

[threestars]

Saw Inception a few weeks ago. Meh, was alright but not spectacular. Going to see Four Lions this weekend, hopefully it is good. The trailer looks quite amusing.

[DaneykoIsGod]

Should have a full review of Get Low and the Expendables by the end of the week but the basic summary is Get Low was quite good, bordering on great and The Expendables was terrible. Absolutely atrocious. And I'm not talking in a smarmy, "I'm a critic and only watch presitge Oscar films" kind of way. I'm talking in a "I went to see something on the level of Commando and got story, acting and direction that bordered on film student level" kind of way. Very disappointing.

Every time Commando is discussed, an angel gets its wings.

Love that friggin flick!

[jagknife]

is it bad that the movie i pretty much dismissed and made fun of 3 days ago is starting to grow on me?

the different commercials are actually making it seem really interesting. favorite one thus far is that TV spot with the security saying a prayer in spanish with flashes of clips

damn you advertising for actually working

[njskaguy33]

New Movie Review

The Expendables

About forty five minutes into Sylvester Stallone’s latest opus to testosterone filled action flicks, the main bad guy of the film, played by Eric Roberts, is wandering through the hovel of the general’s daughter, looking for something. What he’s looking for, the film never explains. When he sees some drawings, one of which the daughter gave to Stallone for reasons the movie never explains, he removes one from the wall and examines it closely. Why he would care about her sketches, as he has no idea she gave one to the very man who’s after him, the film never explains. Upon leaving the building, he confronts the general, brandishes the accursed drawing in his face and bellows, “This is how it STARTS”!

Huh? This is how what starts?

Maybe he’s trying to say that allowing the general’s daughter to cultivate a love of the arts has somehow turned her against her murderous father. Or maybe he’s ruminating on the freedoms the island has lived under and how a more tyrannical rule would help the generals’ and ultimately his cause. Or maybe he just prefers charcoal sketches in favor of colored pencil and is lashing out against this affront to his artistic taste. Guess what. The film never explains…but maybe I can. The aforementioned point in the film is actually the start of something. It’s when the movie stops being a mindless homage to the action stars we grew up with and becomes plain mindless. At that exact point, the film doesn’t jump but soars over the proverbial shark turning something that could have been a lot of fun into something stupid, sophomoric and almost painful to watch. The result is a one of the bigger disappointments of the summer.

The ham-handed and awfully penned story is the standard “group of ex-CIA soldiers gets hired to take down a dictator” fare you’ve seen a hundred times in a hundred different movies. Stallone, along with Jason Statham, Jet Li, Randy Couture and Terry Crews round of out the team but if you’re looking for a big old 80’s reunion, you will be sorely disappointed. In fact, the bulk of the film really revolves around Stallone and Statham, with the rest of the crew merely splitting time and eardrums. While Stallone plays his usual grim self, Statham is the only other cast member who actually looks like he’s trying. The rest of the team badly panders to long established action stereotypes; Li mumbles something about needing money for his family no fewer than four separate times, Crews talks about his weaponry as if they were lovers and Couture talks about going to therapy. Yep, you read right. Therapy and no, it’s nowhere near as funny as they thought it would be. The result is bland, witless banter that serves only as filler between the inevitable fight sequences.

As far as the rest of faces on the movie poster go, they don’t fare much better. The rest of the screen time is split between Dolph Lundgren as ex-member Gunner and Mickey Rourke as Tool, the elder statesman of the group who has retired from mercenary work to become a tattoo artist. While Lundgren is perfectly acceptable as a monstrous ass kicker, Rourke is horribly misused. Given minute after minute of banal monologue, Rourke’s character does nothing but grind the film to a screeching halt. Even Stallone himself looks bored during these drawn out scenes and he wrote the damn thing! The other cameos are simply thrown in as fan service. Bruce Willis overacts his way through the only scene he’s in and Schwarzenegger makes an appearance for exactly thirty seconds. While Stallone and The Governator do share the scene, a moment much ballyhooed by the Comic Con crowd, the result is cheesy and tacked on.

That being said, I cannot blame the actors in this mess, nor can I blame the story. The story is too simplistic to get in the way and the actors are…well…not actors. They’re tough guys with lines. The cardinal sin against this film is in the horrific writing and direction. Note to writer / director Sylvester Stallone: there is a little thing in filmmaking called timing and pacing. This film is a horrid mess of jump cuts, drawn out scenes that go nowhere and timelines so mangled, you would think entire sections of the story were cut out. With a potentially explosive movie like this, the thing should have flown by at breakneck speed but instead stutters, stumbles and jerks its way along like a Ferrari with a stuck transmission and two flat tires. Stallone fails to realize that it actually takes skill and an even hand to create moments of pure violent madness. Blowing people up like an 8th grader with ADD playing Halo just doesn’t do the trick.

Billed as an homage to 80’s action movies, The Expendables does nothing but make audiences wish they were home watching a good 80’s action movie. Going into the film, I told people that I was expecting something along the lines of Commando; a stupid, corny movie that is still a heck of a lot of fun. What I got was a stupid, corny movie that never got better than stupid and corny. Even a few well drawn action scenes, such as the very fun pier explosion scene and Jet Li’s fight with Lundgren, couldn’t save this film from being less than mediocre. In fact, when the much talked about final 40 minutes of constant carnage arrived, I was so thrown off by the badness of the thing, I really couldn’t care less. Besides, after the eightieth explosion and the two hundredth death of a henchman, it all becomes din and white noise anyway.

Promising nothing and delivering less, The Expendables could have been a whole bunch of mindless fun but ends up choppy and incoherent while sporting a story that a third grader could have written. While the film does serve up a healthy dose of visual wizbangs and explosions, the whole experience is too poorly executed to be anything more than a brutal assault on your senses. While I’m fond of saying that action means nothing if you don’t care about the characters involved, I’ll give The Expendables a bit of a pass on that point. Drawn up as mere caricatures of better action stars, the actors in The Expendables really do give it the best they have, which for most of the cast isn’t much. Too bad they couldn’t find a director that spent as much time writing a cohesive story as he did attaching C4 to set pieces and blowing fake soldiers apart with copious amounts of cadmium red. Walking in hoping to get a thrilling ride, I left sporting a splitting headache. At least I got to laugh a little; not with the film, of course, but at it. A film that makes me wish for Mystery Science Theater 3000 to come back on the air, The Expendables is exactly that; a ridiculous and completely avoidable piece of summer blockbuster fluff.

Score: 4 out of 10

Edited August 26, 2010 by Bulletproof

[Satans Hockey]

I saw a commercial that Avatar is back in the theatres for a bit in 3d. Is it really worth seeing in 3d? I haven't seen the movie yet so I'm debating going but I just saw Piranha 3d and completely hated the 3d aspect.

Edited August 27, 2010 by Satans Hockey

[DaneykoIsGod]

I saw a commercial that Avatar is back in the theatres for a bit in 3d. Is it really worth seeing in 3d? I haven't seen the movie yet so I'm debating going but I just saw Piranha 3d and completely hated the 3d aspect.

I saw Avatar in IMAX 3-D (Hamilton) and thought it was worth it. What made it work for me was that Cameron didn't go for the cheesy coming-straight-at-you shot every two seconds like typical 3-D movies do. Instead, it just felt like you were actually looking in on this incredibly detailed fantasy world. Instead of the movie coming at you, you felt like a part of it. I thought, in that regard, it was very well-done. And really, the movie is nothing spectacular story- or acting-wise. It's the visual aspect that makes it what it is, IMO.

[njskaguy33]

Opening This Week – Nationwide

The Last Exorcism – Creeeepy. The biggest film being released this weekend is this fake documentary of a preacher who heads to a rural section of Louisiana to perform his final exorcism. Critics have been largely positive about the movie saying that while it’s framed like the evangelistic Blair Witch Project, the flick offers a good numbers of imaginative scares and is a good ride. Critics, however, have been almost unanimous in hating the ending, which actually peaks my interest. What kind of ending could possibly receive so much hatred from the film going community? I’m intrigued! If spook stories in the vein of The Exorcist are your thing, The Last Exorcism just might be a good choice for you this weekend.

Takers – The lesser of the two new widely released movies coming out this weekend, Takers is looking like an urban Ocean’s Eleven without the style, charm and wit. Starring a cast made up of Matt Dillon and a few rappers, Takers looks to be a very by the numbers shoot ‘em heist movie, complete with the “hardboiled cop” looking to take them down. Critics have been expectedly harsh of this movie with the consensus being that it’s a dumbed down version of Heat. Depending on the critic, some are forgiving of this and some are not, but all are saying this is a skipable film but if you find yourself in the theater watching it, you won’t be completely miserable either.

Avatar: Special Edition 3D – The movie that made so much money, they thought they’d release it again, Avatar makes another venture into theaters with this “Special Edition” promising extra footage. As if the film wasn’t long enough. If you didn’t see Avatar in theaters or in the highly praised 3-D, it’s worth seeing on a big screen if only for the visual wizardry. Just be aware, you may be sitting in a crowd of people with blue faces and Na’vi braids clutching Sam Worthington action figures. Just sayin’…

Opening This Week – Limited

Centurion – The latest film from English director Neil Marshall is story of a Roman centurion who leads his soldiers in a desperate battle against the Pict tribesmen in the 2nd century. If you’ve ever seen a Neil Marshall film, such as a the quite good The Descent or the pretty terrible Doomsday, you know he’s not the most subtle of directors and that flair for stylishly filmed bloodletting continues in Centurion. So long as you go in expecting no character development, limited story and heads being loped off by the dozens, Centurion may just quench your blood lust this weekend. Screening at the Angelika.

Mesrine: Killer Instinct – French film about an ex-solider who after coming home to his rural village after the Algerian War, gets seduced by the bright lights of Paris and joins a crime family with explosive results. While critics have unanimously said that the film is a very uneven affair, everyone is praising the work of Vincent Cassel in the lead. Definitely worth checking out. Showing at the Angelika and AMC 25

Change of Plans (Le Code a Change) – Another French film centering around ten people who meet at a dinner party and during that party start to air their dissatisfactions with their lots in life. Featuring fine performances yet little else, the few critics who have seen this film have said it’s a mixed bag. While it looks to be much better than the 27% it’s getting on Rotten Tomatoes, the blandness of it make me think skip all the way. Showing at Lincoln Plaza Cinemas and IFC Center

Daniel & Ana – Story of a brother and sister, one about to settle into married life and the other still trying to work out his own sexual identity. Not much has been released about this film but what I’ve read has been fairly negative. Showing at Quad Cinema

The Milk Of Sorrow – looking for the award for “Most Depressing Movie Title of the Year”, this film is exactly as depressing as advertised. Dealing with a woman who has a rare disease causing her breast milk to be poisonous, the film outlines the abuse she suffered during her pregnancy and the fear of following in her mother’s footsteps. Yeesh. Critics, however, eat this stuff up and critical response has been very positive, with most saying it’s a visual treat despite the abstract storytelling. To me, this is a DVD flick simply because it’s too sad for a summer day. Showing at Cinema Village 12th St

Highwater – Surfing documentary highlighting the Triple Crown, a Hawaiian surfing competition that runs three months and attracts the best the sport has to offer. Showing this weekend at the Angelika.

My 3 To See

The Last Exorcist – Nowhere near my cup of tea, but that can’t stop me from recommending it if it’s yours. Full of inventive scares and thrill, Last looks to be nice pre Halloween chair gripper for fans of the genre.

Mesrine: Killer Instinct – Looking to be the year of the foreign crime drama, this French import joins Animal Kingdom and A Prophet in the highly acclaimed category. Gritty and realistic, fans of this type of film should be well satisfied with Mesrine.

Scott Pilgram vs The World – Since I really have nothing else I’m dying to recommend, I’ll put this up for one last week.

[jagknife]

The Last Exorcism looks amazing, surprisingly.

and as much as i cannot stand Michael Cera, Scott Pilgrim looks like it has potential to be decent

[95Crash]

As a fan of Robert Rodriguez's Planet Terror, after seeing a couple of ads and commercials for Machete, I'm looking forward to seeing it.

I also wonder if there's any chance that there'll be full-length versions of Don't, Thanksgiving, or Werewolf Women of the SS.

[DH26]

I saw a commercial that Avatar is back in the theatres for a bit in 3d. Is it really worth seeing in 3d? I haven't seen the movie yet so I'm debating going but I just saw Piranha 3d and completely hated the 3d aspect.

Avatar actually does 3D right. The movie's just okay but Cameron spent years on the 3D and it's 100X better than movies like Piranha and the Last Airbender with visuals

[njskaguy33]

My brother just sent me this list of the 10 Worst Movies of 2010 So Far. Hard to find fault with this list, so enjoy!

10 Worst Movies of 2010

[Atterr]

My brother just sent me this list of the 10 Worst Movies of 2010 So Far. Hard to find fault with this list, so enjoy!

10 Worst Movies of 2010

Thank God I haven't seen any of them, although I think that Predators should have been included as well.

On another note, I might be the last person on earth but I finally saw Toy Story 3 yesterday. This will certainly appear in my top 3 movies of this year. Great story and characters, voice actors were spot on, and surprisingly quite emotional at the end. However, I am still not a fan of 3D.

[njskaguy33]

Opening This Week – Nationwide

The American – The big Labor Day movie opening this weekend, The American stars George Clooney as an assassin on a different type of assignment in the Italian countryside. There, he meets a priest, falls for a gal and has to do something involving a mysterious weapon. I’m sure it all makes sense in the movie…maybe. Billed as a Bourne style movie, The American is actually much slower and subdued, screening more like a sophisticated art house film that a rollicking spy movie. To this point, critics have been very mixed on this film with the more negative saying it’s a soulless bore. Still, most critics agree that Clooney does a fine job in the role of a introspective killer and that the film is beautifully shot. Still, those expecting a whirlwind of a film may be disappointed in The American but I’m going to call this one a “see it for yourself” type movie.

Going the Distance – Wait a sec. I could have sworn the posters in the subways said August 27th on this movie, not September 3rd. When a movie gets pushed back this late in the game, you know you have a stinker on your hands. Justin Long of Apple commercial fame and Drew Barrymore star in this rom-com about long distance relationships and the trials associated with them. Critics have been very meh about the movie, with most saying it’s not terrible yet entirely skippable. One review called it the best rom-com of the year, but with the deluge of junk that’s been in theaters this year, I’m not sure if that’s much of a compliment.

Machete – Based off of the fake trailer from the Tarantino / Robert Rodriguez film Grindhouse, Machete is in the same vein as it’s double feature big brother and promises the expected amount of thrills. With an ensemble cast starring Robert De Niro, Jessica Alba and Danny Trejo in the titular role, Machete is a classically told revenge tale with much of the campy B-movie ultra violence Rodriguez is known for, when he’s not doing Spy Kids movies of course. Critics have been largely positive of Machete with many saying this movie is what The Expendables could have been had it had a filmmaker with skill of Rodriguez behind the camera. Fans of his films and Grindhouse especially will have a great deal of fun with Machete this weekend.

Opening This Week – Limited

Last Train Home – Eye opening documentary about the 13 million Chinese workers who migrate from the factories they work back tot heir rural homes for the Chinese New Year. Focusing on one family in particular, this doc has been getting rave reviews from everyone who has seen it and looks to be a heartbreaking and honest look into the chaos surrounding this exodus. Playing at the IFC Center

Mesrine: Public Enemy #1 – Last week, the first Mesrine film, Killer Instinct opened to rave reviews and now one week later comes the second film in this French series staring Vincent Cassel. Now back in France after the events of the first film, Cassel is marked as Public Enemy #1 and has to survive pursuit in his home town. Critics have been just as positive of this film as they were of the first one, so it should definitely be worth a look. Playing at the Angelika, AMC Empire 25 and Clearview First & 62nd.

White Wedding – Classic “get me to the church on time” style film involving a South African couple trying to get to their wedding amongst a series of misadventures. Looking like a South African The Hangover, critics have been mostly positive about this film. Playing at the AMC Lowes Village 7 and AMC Empire 25

The Winning Season – Sam Rockwell, Emma Roberts and Rob Corddry star in this by the number sports story about a down and out misfit who is hired to coach a floundering high school girls basketball team. Critical response has been very average for a film who ending is apparent before you even walk into the theater. Showing at City Cinemas Village East

Prince of Broadway – Story of two men who try to make their way in the underground world of New York’s garment district. While this holds a bit of appeal to me as I work in that area, critics have said my ulterior motives are not necessary and that this is simply a great film. Playing at the Angelika

My Dog Tulip – Animated film based on the book by J.R. Ackerly chronicles the author’s relationship with a precocious German Sheppard named Tulip. Basically think Marley and Me and replace slapstick for honest, heartfelt emotion. Voiced by the incomparable Christopher Plummer, Tulip has been getting rave reviews from critics. Check it out this weekend at the Film Forum

Max Manus – The true story about Max Manus, one of the most brilliant saboteurs of World War II. Also dealing with his personal demons as well as his sabotage, critics have been giving this film very positive reviews, so check it out, especially if you are a World War II buff. Playing this weekend at Quad Cinema

My 3 To See

The American – Despite luke warm critical response, The American looks to be well directed and finely acted, which is just enough for me to give it a cautious recommendation. Still, don’t go in expecting the Bourne American or anything

Machete – Promising the wild fun The Expendables lacked, the latest film by director Robert Rodriguez looks to be brutal and skillfully made. Looks like a winner to me!

Last Train Home – Looking to be a fascinating documentary, Last Train Home is a film worth waiting for if you’re nowhere near the IFC Center this weekend.

[njskaguy33]

New Movie Review

Get Low

Saying Robert Duvall has made himself one heck of a film career could be the understatement of the year. Despite being one of the most celebrated American actors working today, Duvall hasn’t really had many starring roles as of late. With a cameo in Crazy Heart here and few lines in The Road there, Duvall has become one of those actors that you see in a film and say while smiling, “Ahhh…that’s Robert Duvall”. However, not since his Academy Award nominated performance in 1997’s The Apostle has Duvall really showed his stuff as a leading actor and no, Gods and Generals doesn’t count because that film stunk. So, to see Duvall take a stab at an intensely emotional starring role really made me stand up and take notice. Luckily for me, Duvall does not disappoint in Get Low as he puts forth another classic performance, one that should get him a look or two for a Best Actor nomination.

In the film, Duvall plays Felix Bush, a curmudgeonly old hermit who has sequestered himself in his densely wooded farmhouse for over forty years. The year is 1930 and Bush has become quite the folk story for the citizens of the lonely Tennessee town that borders his land. Because of these wild stories, Bush decides to come out of seclusion and with the help of a local funeral director, played by Bill Murray, starts to plan his own funeral. Naturally, there’s a catch: Bush not only wants to attend his own funeral while he’s still alive, he wants to invite everybody in the county that has a story about him and have them tell those tales. What happens next is a touching tale of owning up to the past and confronting ones mortality that cements both Robert Duvall and Bill Murray as acting greats.

Much has been written about Duvall’s performance and all I can say is that the accolades are well deserved. Duvall gives the character of Felix Bush a number of different textures; initially Bush looks to be a miserly old hermit but as the film goes on, you see shades of who he was before the incident that caused him to shy away from the world, especially when he interacts with his old flame, played wonderfully by Sissy Spacek. With Spacek, Bush warms up and projects the charm of an old world gentleman while still maintaining the veneer of grittiness that is the core of the character. While Duvall does err on the side of overacting on occasion, the real triumph of his performance is how connected he is with the events of the film. The story is really about confronting mistakes from the past and Duvall, at the age of 79, brings a sense of personal world weariness to the role that is quite profound. Watching Duvall dig deep into his own fears of mortality and project them on screen is quite moving and makes up for any lapses in his performance.

The rest of the cast is equally superb. Bill Murray, who should also get a look for a Best Supporting Actor Oscar, is brilliant as the town funeral director. Murray has perfected the art or wry comedy and gives the film some humorous flavor while still maintaining a sharp acting performance. Top marks also have to be given to Spacek and Lucas Black as Murray’s protégé in the funeral business. First time director, Aaron Schneider, also deserves credit for maintaining an even tone throughout the film, even though it does play a bit slow in some of the middle sections. Make no mistake, this is a patient movie that plays out almost like a theater production and as a result, has the same magnetic ability to drawn the audience in.

Filled with outstanding performances, solid directing and a final reveal that ties the whole experience together, Get Low is one of the better movies to come out this summer. While the movie does seem to take a while to reach a somewhat predictable conclusion, the quality of acting on display overshadows any missteps in the filmmaking or lapses in the storytelling. A homespun yarn of revelation, self forgiveness and facing one’s imminent demise, Get Low is a rough jewel in an otherwise bland summer season. There may be more exciting pictures in the cinemas right now, but there are few that features two American icons at the top of their game telling a story that nobody wants to see yet everybody ought to.

[grcenter47]

i like Robert Rodriguez and most of the films he has done. Is Machete worth seeing? I think it is but please someone post a review if they will be seeing it

[yankeesjetsfan]

I'm supposed to take a date to see the Other Guys on Sunday. Maybe I can talk her into Machete instead.

Mike

[njskaguy33]

i like Robert Rodriguez and most of the films he has done. Is Machete worth seeing? I think it is but please someone post a review if they will be seeing it

Machete is getting a 75% Fresh rating on Rotten Tomatoes, which is pretty damn good for a "guy movie", so I think it's a pretty safe bet to check out this weekend. As a for a review, I probably wont see it for a bit but I still have reviews for Scott Pilgram vs the World and Restpeto, which I saw last night, to write, so I'm a bit behind

I'm supposed to take a date to see the Other Guys on Sunday. Maybe I can talk her into Machete instead.

Mike

Wow, from buddy cop comedy to Mexican action flick...that's going to be a pretty tough sell! At least she didn't bug you to see Sex In The City or something along those lines and my condolences if she did.

[grcenter47]

i seriously love Michelle Rodriguez

[CRASHER]

I'm supposed to take a date to see the Other Guys on Sunday. Maybe I can talk her into Machete instead.

Mike

the Other Guys was VERY funny and had some unpredictable scenes in it... you'll enjoy it if you end up seeing it!

I'm not a big Will Farrell guy when he stars in the movies but this was most awesome!