NFL Season Preview, Part Two: the NFC

[CRASHER]

Well here's the rest of it... good God in 5 days I'm writing the week one preview... oh boy!!! Man I'm excited!! Pre-season is over and now Christmas for men is 9 days away!!! I already said all my shtick in the AFC part....time to share how I think the other half is gonna live this year.... this should be fun..... (PS suck a dick Matt Leinart you made me TOTALLY re-do the Arizona part!!! )

NFC East:

• 1. Dallas Cowboys (last year: 11-5)

Yes the Cowboys have holes… and HELL YES I am a Cowboys fan (and I know this is year 4 I am picking them to win the division, they have done it 2 of the 3 to defend myself … the LT is a worry… so has the offense in the pre-season been….there’s no play making safety like all the other elite defenses have… but still this team is pretty damn good… and has the monkey off their back… big wins in December, a win in the PLAYOFFS (though a better showing against the Vikings would have been nice, but it did show Flozell Adams the door, as the O-line is where the Cowboys did lose that game)….the QB position is as good as anyones…. Dumbo jokes or not (and I’m calling him Dumbo till he dies at this point after last year!), Romo’s good smart strong and elusive… he may need to be with this line in spots… the running backs are as good and three deep as it gets in the league…keeping Roy Williams with Miles Austin and the soon returning Dez Bryant, with Witten underneath… if Dumbo has time that’s an unstoppable group of weapons (again it comes back to the line though…. And the defense was flat out awesome when it counted last year, Ratliff is as good a pressure-NT as there is in the league, Ware and Spencer had more sacks then the Jaguars… Newman is a good corner… Jenkins will get better (we’re throwing out the film of the Houston game THANKS)… I just wish there was a ball-hawking safety on this team… the schedule is gonna be a bitch though (Saints, Colts and Eagles in a ROW?? Oiiiiiiiii)….but still good teams beat other good teams… Record: 11-5

• 2. Philadelphia Eagles (last year: 11-5)

People are picking the Eagles as the worst team in the division?? WHY??? Because McNabb left?? Really?? Guess they didn’t see Kevin Kolb last year (well it’s not because Michael Vick’s dawg pound for sure…), a lot of it will come down how Kolb will handle the tough Philly system… and tougher Philly phans too … but he has the weapons for sure…DeSean Jackson is as good a home run WR as anyone, Brent Celek is as good a TE that you’ve not heard of…Maclin is consistent, and the other guys are good depth players… the running game of Dr. McCoy and Leonard Weaver would be good if that fat walrus of a coach would use them!!! (but he won’t)…the defense will be tough and attack heavy (the spirit of Jim Johnson certainly lives there… Jesus that’s two Philly teams I said something nice about this year… I’m losing it )… the defense did allow too many passing TDs last year… but it was a lot of injuries, and in spite of Asante Samuels who was still good….the D will be better (simply because it’s healthier) And I really think this is still the 2^nd best team in the NFC and pushing for a playoff spot…. Record: 9-7

• 3. New York Giants (last year: 8-8)

This is a tough team to figure out, they didn’t really address their needs (the running game, and the LB-corps… though at least being a pass-first team (and make no bones about it they are now)…. With the new stadium this may not be as much of a problem as it was in the old place (I’ve been told from a few people that have gone to the place that it’s no longer a giant wind tunnel), but still… Brandon Jacobs seems to be a fail (sadly unless he’s playing the Cowboys, go figure).. carries the ball high, doesn’t hit the hole at full speed and is still fumble-prone… and rumbling has been that Bradshaw is gonna be the lead back (which might work better for both guys, less could be more of Jacobs), and the offense will be alright… to probably pretty good (and few QBs in the league are better at the last drive comeback/two-minute offense then Eli is)… now on defense…. Well that’s a different story… the D-Line is still imposing, but not as deep as it used to be… the LB’s still suck, and the secondary is eh….this team has a lot going for it… but it’s also got ALOTTA holes too….add in the brutal schedule the NFC East has as a whole… it might be a rough season for the Giants….Record: 9-7

• 4. Washington Redskins (last year: 4-12)

And look… we saved the funniest for last eh??? Already mishandling the Albert Haynesworth disaster (just play the guy at DE already)… grabbing RB’s at random like it was a fantasy football draft back in 2005, a miserable (and that’s generous) group of WRs… boy McNabb is gonna wish he was sent to Buffalo this year … the O-Line should be better under Shanahan (…..19… ZAJAC!!! Ok, I had to go there once) and his douchey borderline illegal blocking tech….but man I used to call the Ravens a pop-gun offense… THIS is a pop-gun offense… and boy oh boy, when McNabb gets hurt… it’s REX GROSSMAN TIME!! (hell McInjury is already sitting out games)… and on defense?? Ummmm… I really don’t see a helluva lot here… coach rosey-cheeks (he reminds me of the old “spitting image” puppets… and the Ronald Regan ones… ah go google it your damn self I can’t do EVERYTHING for you, and let’s be honest… this team SUCKS, it might not even be fun to torture Dave about this team… but somehow I will find a way… it’s what I do!!! (least they will be in the top 5 for Anti-Football specials!!!) Record: 5-11

NFC North:

• 1. Green Bay Packers (last year: 11-5)

Much like the 49ers this seems to be a popular pick of late… I had it decided in my head before the universe jumped on Packer-mania though….the buzz has picked up a lot too though… I hear a lot of A-Rod for MVP (well without the steroids and Madonna incident… and well to be honest, playing a tolerable sport!), just the simple fact that Aaron Rodgers is THAT good and that ready to take the next step! (this team DID put up 461 points last year), the running game got better as the year went on, the receivers are deep and talented… no one is a better home-run hitter in the NFL then Greg Jennings, Driver is solid as ever (think better version of Derek Mason… SUCK IT RAVENS!!)…. The only problem and sore point on the Packers is the O-Line… it’s why they couldn’t beat team Fraud last year, and it was because the Packers could not contain the pass rush from the front 4.. not because of the douchebag wearing #4 (tell ESPN that though please)… the defense is also VERY good (when healthy which also seems to be a problem), least rushing yards allowed… 30 (wow!!) Interceptions and 4 TD’s on defense… and Charles Woodson is as good a corner to not have a stupid Island named after him as there is! They just never seem to finish the season….to steal the NHL catchphrase… is this the year?? I think so… Record: 12-4

• 2. Minnesota Vikings (last year: 12-4)

OH MY GOD BRETT FAVRE IS BACK, CANCEL THE SEASON, AWARD THE VIKINGS LOMBARDI AND LET THEM GO CHASE THE HEAT FOR THE NBA TITLE…. Alright… I’m done with that… and yes the douchebag had a great year last year (uh, duh, teams played the rush and this team was pretty loaded!)… Adrian Peterson is an obvious game-changer… but man injuries (or some would say, like me, karma) are starting to put some chinks in the armor… gone for half the season (maybe more) Sidney Rice with hip surgery… Percy Harvin still has headaches from all the talking heads trying to get in line to suck-off Favre (I know it’s serious stuff… but hey it’s me… I insult stuff, whatever)… enter Javon Walker and whatever he has left in the tank to add to the nostalgia hunt….anyway… the front 4 is still VERY good and can get to any QB at any time, not playing in New Orleans….the DB’s kinda suck and if you can get time to throw… you can torch them… this team is still pretty good, despite it’s gutless worm of a coach… and will be in the playoff hunt the whole way through…. Record: 10-6

• 3. Chicago Bears (last year: 7-9)

If you can figure out the direction the Bears are going in and can explain it to me, I’d LOVE to listen… because I look at this team and shake my head in WTF like I would the Kovalchuk drama in Jersey, yes they added Julius Peppers and it was a good thing… but the annual Brian Urlacher season-ending injury seems to come sooner and sooner (hell he’s hurt in pre-season already), Chester Taylor is a great RB addition for a Mike Martz offense… you know.. allergic to hand-off… and how the hell do you bring a pass happy dope like him when your best WR’s are a failed D-Back and a reject from Jackass?? They have good TE’s… oh yeah Martz hates THEM too (again you bring an OC in to FIT THE PLAYERS not make the team fit his dumb drunken ways!) and wow I didn’t even MENTION Jay Cutler who hasn’t seen an INT for 6 he doesn’t like throwing! Anyway… least the defense should be better (but there’s gonna be out there a LOT after those 3 play 1:01 drives followed by a punt… or worse)… the secondary is weak here too and not good when the other teams in the division actually have competent wideouts, and I’m not big on Lovie Smith as a coach either (but we can’t fire him cause he’s black and people get offended right??)….this reeks of a 3^rd place team that are closer to the Lions then the other 2 guys….Record: 7-9

• 4. Detroit Lions (last year: 2-14)

The word here is improved….for fvck’s sake they had enough high end draft pics to bolster this team right??? (and they got over the Matt Millen hard-on for receivers…speaking of which… tangent time… how in the HELL do you go from arguably being the man who built one of the worst groups of teams in SPORTS HISTORY, finally get fired (in fact a parade followed in Detroit after and NO ONE was killed even!)… and then get a cushy job as an EXPERT on the NFL’s GAME OF THE WEEK??? Oh yeah.. it’s NBC and they did the same thing with Mike Milbury )… anyway… the cancer has been removed in Detroit (errr, d’oh) and things are getting better!!! REALLY!!! But then again… 4-12 is better….

What IS IT with me and the bad teams and I go on for days about them?? It’s gotta be the anti-football love!! Matthew Stafford is the ballsiest son of a bitch I’ve seen throw a football since Phillip Rivers (go watch the end of that Browns game… you tube it… I’ll wait….ready?? Good… you sure??), Calvin Johnson is an awesome weapon… Javid Best adds depth and talent to the running game… the billion dollar question is can they block for these guys?? The D-Line is rebooted and will actually get a pass rush or two now and then (sorry Redskin fans… ok… just Dave… Kyle Vandenbusch is NOT Albert Haynesworth 2.0).. the secondary is bad too (seems to be a pre-req for playing in this division eh?)… but Rome wasn’t built in a day… and hell least the fires are put out and it’s not burning!!! …. Record: 5-11

NFC South:

• 1. New Orleans Saints (last year: 13-3)

I know I’m a brave person, I picked the team that won the freaking Super Bowl to do well again right??? Amazing !! Well look at this team, they didn’t lose any starters (at least any important ones)… and how rare is that in the modern sport world to have ANY championship team stay fully intact (well except in ba$eball, where the Yankees and Red Sox buy the fun out of the game, but hey it gives bitter Buffalo fans who cry poverty in every other sport the chance to feel good right?)…anyway… great O-Line, superior QB play and coaching… balanced running game, random WR acts of goodness (Lance Moore still needs to die of a vicious disease of MY choosing), the D-Line is good… and the secondary is the most opportunistic thing this side of WWE’s Edge with random married Diva’s… I mean yes the D is a big small and can get beat up, but they MAKE PLAYS, the offense certainly makes plays, and Reggie Bush is as dangerous a game changer as there is in football…. There is no doubt this team will be good (barring an EPIC FAIL injury) and will be one of the teams to beat in the NFC, though amazingly the “experts” are taking a heaping sh!t on them… Record: 12-4

• 2. Atlanta Falcons (last year: 8-8)

And again… like I was saying above…. Yahoo Pro Sports Football Weekly picked the FALCONS to win the division over the Saints??? They’re INSANE!! Yes I know the Falcons will be better… Michael Turner is back and will be a beast I know this… and we know the GREAT Matt Ryan (put the initials together and chuckle if you are privy to the inside joke) will be better as he starts to enter his prime years and grows up as a QB… Roddy White and Tony Gonzalez fill out the receiving game… if only the Falcons had a true legit #2 WR, this would be a top-level offense… but one can always develop…. The problem for Atlanta comes on the other side of the ball… the D is a little soft (even more so then New Orleans) and can also get mangled but is nowhere near as turnover-happy as the Saints are… and they also don’t have a Reggie Bush type player on their team… it’s why the Saints are better and will win the division again, but Atlanta could very easily be a Wild Card team….Record: 9-7

• 3. Carolina Panthers (last year: 7-9)

This is the toughest team in the NFC South to figure out….they had the biggest losses and you can say they didn’t do much to replace them… gone is Julius Peppers to the Bears, and also kicked out the door, much to the cheers of everyone, turnover factory Jake Delhomme went to Cleveland which is the only place dumb…. BRAVE… enough to welcome him in and call him son (sh!t I heard he can try out to replace LeBron too)… Matt Moore is a step in the right direction for the Panther offense no doubt, but even with someone capable of throwing the ball… ain’t no one to throw to aside of Steve Smith… the battle in camp for the other WR spot is still way wide open and no one seems able to go take it….but the fact that the O-line is good and the backs are awesome should make it easier to make plays through the air….on the other side of the ball, the defense has a LOT of questions… who will get to the QB? The D-Line is not too good and the Panthers don’t like to blitz to get pressure (not to mention teams that don’t press and cause havoc tend to get eaten up by the advanced offenses run in the NFL now)… and unless a more attack-based thought process comes in here, the Carolina D is gonna be on the lesser end of the league… and there’s just so many question marks with this team now… I can’t take them or see them being any good…. But least they have hope at the QB spot now….Record: 6-10

• 4. Tampa Bay Buccaneers (last year: 3-13)

The bottoming out process finally began for Tampa… that’s the good news… the bad news … it ain’t done yet…At least Josh Freeman gets to work in the same offensive system two years in a row (something Jason Campbell would only DREAM of), but the only worry there is they talk about his size, strength and athletic ability but worry about his accuracy… remind anyone of Jamarcus Russel?? And there’s no veteran help there either… but ah fvck it, this team’s gonna suck anyway, and at least the running game is solid enough that it can ease the pain on the young QB’s, and they have a solid O-Line to make holes and let the passing game develop…. The problem is you or I could train run a 4.4 40 and end up playing WR on this team!! The best guy they got is REGGIE BROWN?? (I guess they can go get Antionio Bryant now, HA!) Holy sh!t that’s rough… they should bring Herm Edwards in to call plays… it’s gonna be 3 yards and a mask in the dirt A LOT there (poor Winslow, he’s the only guy worth a sh!t who can catch the ball)… on defense it looks a lil bleak too, but at least they drafted some guys up front who could improve over the season, the LB’s are meh… and the secondary does have the better of the Barber twins in it… but when you can run the ball for a million yards on the Bucs… why bother throwing?? They’re making baby steps in the right way… but this team is still pretty brutal…. Record 4-12

NFC West:

• 1. San Francisco 49ers (last year: 8-8)

This is a VERY trendy pick this year… and when you look at the rest of the NFC West and then look at this team I can see why…. The O-Line was upgraded with 2 1^st round picks, the running game has one of the steadiest guys in the league in Frank Gore… and now adding Brian Westbrook behind him for depth gives them options… the WR’s are growing and developing (and yes Crabtree is no Michael Hewyard-Bey)… Alex Smith is not spectacular, but he’s survived still in SF and he’s efficient enough on this team….the defense is strong and solid (and ANYONE who’s played fantasy football with Individual D-players… they KNOW who Patrick Willis is)… it’s funny how the weakness on D is the same as the weakness on offense here…. Can the 49ers stretch the field and can they stop the big pass??? Compared to everyone else in the NFC Least…. I think they can, least more better then anyone else out here… so the winner and new NFC West Champion (by default I admit)…..Record: 9-7

• 2. Arizona Cardinals (last year: 10-6)

PRAISE JESUS (seems like that blessing went right past Matt Leinart (HEATHEN!) and went right to Derek Anderson!)…. Kurt Warner’s gone… and boy does this totally change EVERYTHING in Arizona… and now the guy he was brought in to mentor and backup finally gets the ball back in his hands… and also gone is the reliable #2 target Anquan Boldin…. And with those two changes and the addition of run-blocker deluxe Alan Faneca, and even with that all in place,…. Matt Leinart does a five star job of showing all things with the ML initials are totally unreliable and can’t be counted on when it matters (it’s an inside joke get over it!!), and he all but HANDED the job to Derek Anderson who’s gonna get the keys to the best car he’s ever driven! I still think the Cardinals are gonna shift to a “run-more” mindset and to the the benefit of Beanie Wells for sure. I’m sure the passing game will be “alright” (no longer dynamic) and Larry Fitzgerald will still put up his numbers and Breaston was a great #3, can he be a good #2?? Also adding Kerry Rhodes and Joey Porter can only help the defense too…. Can you see this team is trying to morph into “Pittsburgh West”? … the linebackers need some more work too …. But this team is solid, but the question at QB, even half-answered by Derek Anderson, makes them not sure enough to be the class of the NFC West… Record: 8-8

• 3. Seattle Seahawks (last year: 5-11)

A team that just about everything that could have went wrong for them did… the strength of the team (the O-line crumbled)… the running game never stabilized, and the coaching staff and front office took a mass termination for it, and this whole damn team pretty much got turned upside down… and in comes Pete Carroll to re-start the whole damn thing (not to mention turn and run from the mass sanctions going on at USC… but that’s not my problem), the good news is there are some good pieces here…hell they have the best QB in the division now with Hasselbeck, the WRs are decent, and I liked Justin Forsett’s development late last year even with the rest crumbling….the defense has some players too, but you can see this is a unit being re-worked too, especially on the D-Line, and getting some kinda pass rush is gonna be important (as it is for any team in football obviously, as I see the 3 most important things in football as, the guy who can throw the ball, the dude who protects him and the guy or guys on the other side who kill the other QB)… they won’t be as bad as last year and in this division they COULD put it together better then the other two teams, but I don’t think they will…. It will be an improvement though…. Record: 7-9

• 4. St. Louis Rams (last year: 1-15)

The 4^th team in a 3-team race here… and when you look at this team you’re not shocked they lost 15 games last year…. You’re amazed they won ONE game….the QB situation is bleak… an unproven vastly overpaid rookie… AJ Feely and a dude named NULL… kinda fitting, the receivers are brutal (589 yards and 5 TDs that all you got??)….yes they have Steven Jackson and NO ONE is better in the NFL (but you forget because this team is pitiful….), the O-line is getting better, but here’s another sick stat…. the CB’s on this team… ZERO interceptions last year…. There’s a LOT of work to be done in St.Louis (*insert standard Scott comments here*)…. And hell this team just sucks, and since I don’t think they’re gonna go 1-15 again this year… I’ll give them two wins… one for each screwjob out there (see, making fun of himself too!)…. Record 2-14

[MantaRay]

Don't overrate the Vikings. Without Sidney Rice and Chester Taylor the offense is NOT going to be as good as last year. And Favre's stats last year were a complete aberration.

[CRASHER]

Don't overrate the Vikings. Without Sidney Rice and Chester Taylor the offense is NOT going to be as good as last year. And Favre's stats last year were a complete aberration.

I didn't

they are still way better then the bears and lions with their front 4 alone

[MantaRay]

I think Manta might think what I thought at first glance, that the record you put next to each team is your project W/L for each time.

Your right Marty. I stand corrected. I saw "12-4" and thought NOT this year. 10-6, or 9-7 seems more realistic as Crasher predicted.

Also, I think the Lions go .500 this year. I really like what they have built the past few years on both sides of the ball.

I didn't

they are still way better then the bears and lions with their front 4 alone

They also have a much more difficult schedule.

[Hi, I'm VALUE!]

Your right Marty. I stand corrected. I saw "12-4" and thought NOT this year. 10-6, or 9-7 seems more realistic as Crasher predicted.

Also, I think the Lions go .500 this year. I really like what they have built the past few years on both sides of the ball.

They also have a much more difficult schedule.

If the Lions go .500 this year, there will be mass terminations in the Windy City

[grcenter47]

NFC EAST

Dallas 12-4

New York 9-7

Washington 8-8

Philadelphia 5-11

NFC NORTH

Green Bay 13-3

Detroit 11-5

Minnesota 8-8

Chicago 4-12

NFC SOUTH

New Orleans 13-3

Atlanta 11-5

Carolina 6-10

Tampa bay 2-14

NFC WEST

Seattle 10-6

San Fransisco 9-7

Arizona 7-9

St Louis 3-13

I am going to go out on a limb and say that Seattle and Detroit are going to impress this year but I see Green Bay and Dallas as probably playing for the NFC Championship

[CRASHER]

man my poor NFC preview got totally pooped on .... should have published this one first

[Jerrydevil]

It'd be fun to see 7-9 win the NFC West. Not likely, but if any division could do it, this one could.

[CRASHER]

It'd be fun to see 7-9 win the NFC West. Not likely, but if any division could do it, this one could.

I root for that EVERY year!!!

If San Diego struggles without Vincent Jackson and their LT (they could, their defense gets worse each year too)... the AFC West could be a 7-9 winner too

[Jerrydevil]

I root for that EVERY year!!!

If San Diego struggles without Vincent Jackson and their LT (they could, their defense gets worse each year too)... the AFC West could be a 7-9 winner too

I could see that, too.

[CRASHER]

and I can see San Diego kinda stumbling a bit... they do tend to start of the year alot...and they should run the ball more this year, their D kinda scares me, no playmakers on it

the more I think and look at the Chargers the more YUCK I see... this is a big game for them Monday Night

[Jerrydevil]

and I can see San Diego kinda stumbling a bit... they do tend to start of the year alot...and they should run the ball more this year, their D kinda scares me, no playmakers on it

the more I think and look at the Chargers the more YUCK I see... this is a big game for them Monday Night

Charger defense is a question mark, no doubt. It'll be interesting to see if a division foe will step up and surpass them. We've been waiting for the Raiders to be halfway decent for 10 years now.